The following appeared in a health magazine The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they d

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a health magazine.
"The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat."

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

In this passage, the author argues that citizens of Forsythe have adapted a more healthy lifestyle. To support his/her claim, he/she cites result of recent survey, sales of foods product containing kiran, and reduced sales of sulia as well. Quite reasonable though such recommendation appears at first glance, a closer scrutiny reveals that the conclusion lacks crucial supports and therefore we need to consider more evidence to help evaluate such conclusion.

To start off, we need evidence to verify if there exists an improvement for citizens' eating habit. While it is shown that they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendation, no evidence serves to rule out the probability that recent survey reflects the truth of citizens' eating habit or government nutritional recommendation is the right demand for citizens' eating habit. Thus, additional evidence is needed to decide whether the result of survey is impartial and such recommendation is accurate requirement based on scientific research. If new information shows that the result of survey is blemished or officials who draft such recommendation doesn't possess sufficient knowledge or investigation for eating habit, it is reasonably safe to claim that the improvement of citizens' eating habit is groundless and his/her claim will be weakened. On the contrary, if new evidence discloses that all of aforementioned surmise could be eliminated, his/her claim will be strengthened.

Furthermore, we need more evidence to ascertain whether sales of kiran could effectively lead to decline of cholesterol in citizens. First of all, while kiran might help people to ameliorate cholesterol, we need to understand whether food products produced by kiran also keep such functionality. If major ingredients have been refined and the effective elements for curing cholesterol has been greatly removed, the functionality of product to decrease cholesterol is in great doubt and his/her claim will be rendered much less advisable. Second, we need to know the reason whether citizens could take such food products or how frequently they could take as food. If it turns out that citizens seldom eat such food products after buying, we are unconvinced of the wholesome functionality mentioned above.

Last but not least, despite the presence of all previous evidence, a more accurate evaluation of the author's statement regarding also requires further information. Specific evidence is needed to decide whether reduced sales of sulia represent the diminishing chances of eating them by citizens; that is to say, we need to grasp with more concrete statistics about the amount that citizens take sulia in their daily life. If the actual eating amount of sulia doesn't decrease despite its dwindling sales, his/her claim will be weakened. By constrast, if overall ingesting statistics of sulia greatly dampened as its waning sales, we are inclined to regards it as a positive signal that more citizens have stepped into healthier life.

In summary, the evidence cited by the author in the argument could not provide sufficiently conclusive information to make his/her claim compelling. As a result, we need to consider more evidence to help evaluate such conclusion.

Votes
Average: 6.8 (2 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 662, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...officials who draft such recommendation doesnt possess sufficient knowledge or investi...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 102, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ence, a more accurate evaluation of the authors statement regarding also requires furth...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 459, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...e. If the actual eating amount of sulia doesnt decrease despite its dwindling sales, h...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, regarding, second, so, then, therefore, thus, well, while, in summary, as a result, first of all, on the contrary, that is to say

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 45.0 28.8173652695 156% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 66.0 55.5748502994 119% => OK
Nominalization: 28.0 16.3942115768 171% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2736.0 2260.96107784 121% => OK
No of words: 501.0 441.139720559 114% => OK
Chars per words: 5.46107784431 5.12650576532 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73107062784 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96780278239 2.78398813304 107% => OK
Unique words: 244.0 204.123752495 120% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.487025948104 0.468620217663 104% => OK
syllable_count: 864.0 705.55239521 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 4.96107784431 262% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 2.70958083832 332% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.3306846897 57.8364921388 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 144.0 119.503703932 120% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.3684210526 23.324526521 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.63157894737 5.70786347227 151% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.205766085653 0.218282227539 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0685343083735 0.0743258471296 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0770591988962 0.0701772020484 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.113527047434 0.128457276422 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0716209587932 0.0628817314937 114% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.5 14.3799401198 122% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 48.3550499002 76% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.68 12.5979740519 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.4 8.32208582834 113% => OK
difficult_words: 142.0 98.500998004 144% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 510 350
No. of Characters: 2669 1500
No. of Different Words: 238 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.752 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.233 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.908 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 199 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 157 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 123 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 70 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.842 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.686 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.947 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.355 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.567 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.268 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5