The following appeared in a health magazine."The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a health magazine.

"The citizens of Forsythe have adopted more healthful lifestyles. Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat."

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

The author of the argument asserts that dwellers of Forsythe have started to lead more healthy life-style. Although the conclusion is supported by some evidences such as statistical data about sales of sulia and kiran and results of a recent survey, these evidences should be scrutinized carefully in order to evaluate the soundness of the author's conclusion.

First of all, we were told that a recent survey has demonstrated that residents of the area have adopted eating habits which match government's recommendations closer than it was ten years ago. Although this statement, at first, seems to be convincing, the assertion is equivocal due to the fact that we are not given either initial data about survey, which was carried out ten years ago, nor the results of the recent survey. Therefore, the probability exists that, for instance, ten years ago only 1 per cent of surveyed people followed the recommendations; in this case even 2 per cent of citizens who were interviewed will be twice as much as it used to be. Consequently, we need to have access to the information about both surveys in order to be able to interpret them correctly.

Furthermore, the author avers that sales of products which contain kiran have increased four times. Although this statement sounds strikingly and gives us perception that the change is significant, in reality we need to know about initial size of sales. This knowledge will give us an opportunity to evenhandedly estimate the size of the change; Without knowing this information we may surmise that, for example, the possibility exists that initial volume of sales were insignificant in this case, the four-time increase will not be impressive. Moreover, the mere increase of consumption of a certain product may not lead to a healthier life-style, if inhabitants of the city will keep consuming other unhealthy products. In this case, it will be useful to learn about sizes of sales of other products which contain bad fats and preservatives.

The author of the argument tries to answer this question. He or she maintains that sales of products which contain sulia have reduced. However, the impact of sulia on health of citizens is not conspicuous due to the fact that we were given the information only that the healthiest citizens rarely eat it. However, this information says nothing about negative facets of the product. The explanation of the decline in the sales may be that sulia perhaps has a specific taste which will not be attractive for many people or food which contains this chemical is traditional for some group of people. For instance, if people stop buying such vegetable as root, it does not mean that the product is harmful or unhealthy, it may signalize that some Russians who traditionally use it for cooking stop buying it because, for instance, they cannot afford it.

In conclusion, the writer of the argument believes that people who live in Forsythe have adopted healthier life-style. Unfortunately, the information given to us does not manage to create a sound argument due to the fact that this data is insufficient to make a thoughtful analysis of the eating habits of local residents.

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Average: 4 (3 votes)
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Comments

argument 1 -- not OK.

argument 2 -- not OK

argument 3 -- not OK
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In GRE/GMAT, we have to accept all data or evidence are true. It is important to find out loopholes behind surveys or studies. Loopholes mean that we accept all surveys told are true, but there are some conditions applied, for example:

It works for time A (10 years ago), but it doesn't mean it works for time B (nowadays).

It works for location A (a city, community, nation), but it doesn't mean it works for location B (another city, community, nation).

It works for people A (a manager), but it doesn't mean it works for people B (a worker).

It works for event A (one event, project... ), but it doesn't mean it works for event B (another event, project...).

......
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Let's analyze the structure of the statement and argue accordingly:

condition 1:
Their responses to a recent survey show that in their eating habits they conform more closely to government nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago.

//the author should take into account the possibility that the government nutritional standard might have changed over the years, and it has become less rigid compared to the past recommendation.

and suppose the recommendation keeps the same, are same people taking the survey ? maybe more young people were taking the survey while nowadays old people are taking the survey.

condition 2:
Furthermore, there has been a fourfold increase in sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol. //maybe the overall population in Forsythe has increased over the years

condition 3:
This trend is also evident in reduced sales of sulia, a food that few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat. //maybe sulia is so expensive

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: ? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 526 350
No. of Characters: 2588 1500
No. of Different Words: 235 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.789 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.92 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.79 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 178 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 136 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 103 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 67 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.684 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.499 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.684 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.329 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.54 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.159 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

Hello. I have carefully read your recommendations to this essay and as a result I would like to receive your opinion about some questions.
First of all, I my second argument is that despite the fact that sales of the products which are contained kiran, we cannot possibly be accepted it as a solid evidence due to that the importance of the fourfold increase is connected with initial volume of sales.
if I understand the argument correctly, a volume of sales has increase four time in comparison with the previous sales. To illustrate the idea: we used to sell one kilo of spices per week, today we manage to sell 4 kilogram of the same product a week. if we used to sell 1000 kg per week, a new result is 4000 kg a week. Therefore the effect of the increase is explicitly and directly depends on the initial volume of sales. I hope that I manage to convey my reasoning.
The point is that I undoubtedly accept that sales of products which contain the element increase four times; however, I disagree with the conclusion that impact of the increase is inevitably significant.
Hope to receive your answer. Your comment is important for my. Thank you.

Additionally to it, the author of the argument asserts that sales of sulia which few of the most healthy citizens regularly eat has decrease. From author's prospect it is a sign of "adaptation more healthful lifestyles by the citizens"; however, no information is given about its effect on health. Why should I accept that sulia is harmful or unhealthy? Therefore in my essay I point out on that connection between the decrease of usage of the chemical and "more healthful lifestyles of the local residents| is not obvious. At the same time, I unquestionably believe and accept that the decrease of consumption of products which contain sulia has declined. I hope that your explanation clarifies my misunderstandings. Thank you.

How can I learn more about right and wring analysis of argument? It seems that my answer correct or incorrect rather accidently that as a result of my conscious actions. I desperately need to understand the requirements of ETS. Unfortunately, criteria for estimation of essay given by ETS are ambiguous. Hope to acquire from you a piece of advice how I can understand ETS's criteria. Thank you.

Well, still you need to go ETS website and understand the requirements over there even though it is hard to figure them out exactly.

In our understanding, you can consider argument essays as a 'IQ test'. There are some loopholes behind the conditions. When the conditions are changed, the conclusion will change. for example:

It works for time A (10 years ago), but it doesn't mean it works for time B (nowadays).

It works for location A (a city, community, nation), but it doesn't mean it works for location B (another city, community, nation).

It works for people A (a manager), but it doesn't mean it works for people B (a worker).

It works for event A (one event, project... ), but it doesn't mean it works for event B (another event, project...).

................etc..

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You may read some sample essays or GRE books to get them understood. It is a little bit tricky at the beginning, but it is not difficult. You will be on the right track soon by some practice.