The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of movie-rental stores."In order to stop the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore's ten movie-rental stores. Since we are famous f

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The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of movie-rental stores.

"In order to stop the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore's ten movie-rental stores. Since we are famous for our special bargains, raising our rental prices is not a viable way to improve profits. Last month our store in downtown Marston significantly decreased its operating expenses by closing at 6:00 P.M. rather than 9:00 P.M. and by reducing its stock by eliminating all movies released more than five years ago. By implementing similar changes in our other stores, Movies Galore can increase profits without jeopardizing our reputation for offering great movies at low prices."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

Movies Galore's owner claimed that to stop their declining profits, they should some similar changes like their downtown office Marston has already applied. They decreased their operating expenses by closing their office at 6 pm instead of 9 pm and also, they eliminate their movie stock by subtracting the movies which released more than five years ago. However, applying the same changes would jeopardize their profit with this little research. He needs to show us more accurate examples with numbers and another ways to increasing more profit.

In a very myopic way, he suggested that their downtown office Marston decreased its operating expenses by closing at 6:00 P.M. instead of 9:00 P.M. in this manner they increased their profit, however he did not give enough information about the store's location, maybe their downtown area is not active after 6:00 p.m. which works for them, on the other hand this location could be more active after 6 pm, maybe people want to watch movie at midnight. Thus, it would be a big mistake to applying the same operating hours to this location without knowing any numbers of movie renting in day time and evening time.

Additionally, he claimed that to decrease their operating expenses they should apply the similar changes like downtown branch which they eliminated their movies which released more than five years ago to get a more space on their stock. Nevertheless, we never know people's desire about movie, many people love nostalgic movies, think about you are very famous movie-rent store and you are saying your customer we do not have that specific movie why because we eliminated our movies according to their release date, we only carry at most five years old movies. This is really embracing for movie rent store. Their range should be wide enough to satisfy people's movie needs. Hence, he should consider his customers, if not he has to lose money by losing customer whom he does not care their movie desire.

Finally, he should find another way to make profit, only by considering their downtown branch is not comprehensive solution, he needs more information to change their working conditions. They could be famous with their bargain price, but he definitely should find some ways like most popular films could be little bit more pricey or they can apply promotions by the time according to seasons desire. Like in Christmas time they can make profit on Christmas related movies. And also people want to watch similar movies to new released one, even more if one of the series of movie's last episode is released people incline to watch earlier series also. He needs to find strategical solutions to make profit like these kind of sublime solutions.

In conclusion, his assumptions are unstated for argument. He needs more investigation to make profit. He only focusing on operational expenses, but there is also another expenses that he needs to find. He did not give any information why their profit getting decrease, maybe a new movie rent store opened in their neighbor, maybe new stores environment is more attractive for customer. People love fancy stores, they want to be in there even if their prices are high, they do not care. Hence, he needs to check other stores, and also maybe he needs to do renovation not only physical but also maybe he needs to upgrade their movie variety if he wants to make profit.

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Sentence: He needs to show us more accurate examples with numbers and another ways to increasing more profit.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to another and ways

Sentence: Nevertheless, we never know people's desire about movie, many people love nostalgic movies, think about you are very famous movie-rent store and you are saying your customer we do not have that specific movie why because we eliminated our movies according to their release date, we only carry at most five years old movies.
Description: A WH-adverb is not usually followed by a conjunction, subordinating
Suggestion: Refer to why and because

Sentence: He only focusing on operational expenses, but there is also another expenses that he needs to find.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to another and expenses

Sentence: He did not give any information why their profit getting decrease, maybe a new movie rent store opened in their neighbor, maybe new stores environment is more attractive for customer.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to movie and rent. Change to 'movie rental store'

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Words: 572 350 (write the essay in half an hour. The conclusion can be shorter)

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 572 350
No. of Characters: 2752 1500
No. of Different Words: 241 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.89 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.811 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.354 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 187 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 129 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 82 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.785 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.682 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.336 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.519 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.189 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5