The following appeared in a memorandum written by the vice president of Health Naturally, a small but expanding chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products.
"Our previous experience has been that our stores are most profitable in areas where residents are highly concerned with leading healthy lives. We should therefore build one of our new stores in Plainsville, which clearly has many such residents. Plainsville merchants report that sales of running shoes and exercise equipment are at all-time highs. The local health club, which nearly closed five years ago due to lack of business, has more members than ever, and the weight-training and aerobics classes are always full. We can even anticipate a new generation of customers: Plainsville's schoolchildren are required to participate in a program called Fitness for Life, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The memorandum as stated requests to build a new store of Health Naturally in the Plainsville, seeing the report provided by the merchants of fitness stores of Plainsville. It further states that the local health club, which was initially closed, is now booming at an immense rate. These assertions however raises a plethora of questions and must be reached a sound conclusion after a deep scrutiny.
Initially, Health Naturally stores are lucrative in areas where people are health conscious. In Plainsville, people are considerate about their health as the merchants have reported and so this has resulted a boon int their business. But there may be the case, these health and fitness stores have been established a long time ago and in upcoming years they have conquered the sports market in Plainsville. Their business is highly set and they may be providing health goods and equipment not only to Palinsville, but also to the other towns and cities. Also there may be only one or two shops of health products in Plainsville and thus, people are forced to buy only from these stores when in need. Considering these cases, the report provided by the merchants is doubtful and invalid.
Secondly, the local store was closed five years ago, but now their business has been skyrocketed. The reasons for the same are not specified. Initially what was the age group of the members at this local health store? How many members are now present? Is it significant to consider or there has been only a small increase since last time the data was recorded or documented? There is no statistical data to verify the same. Also, it may be the case, the local health club was closed due to some renovation and now it possesses a large number of facilities comparative to one present last time. There may be also a special group of trainers and nutritionists which may be continuously inspecting the members while they workout and correct them if they go wrong to elicit full benefits of the exercises they indulge in. Also the highest age group of people may be between the gamut of 20-50, where youngsters are health freak and thus weight-training and aerobics programs are highly taken. At the end, the local store may have dropped their prices to considerable amount and due to this many people can now afford to undertake membership, thus increasing the membership in the store.
Moreover, the vice president of Health Naturally anticipates the children to be included in their membership if a store opens in Plainsville. However, it is not stated what are the liking of sports by children. There is no data that supports the fact that children have a penchant for swimming or basketball. What if the Health Naturally undertakes a health program which is opposite to the children liking? Also if the fee for children is respectably high comparative to local stores, then people may prefer to join local stores rather than the Health Naturally store. Also, if the store is too far from the local residing areas, there is a possibility of very few children joining the club.
To conclude, there are a number of questions that remain unanswered. Albeit, there may be some profit to Health Naturally store, but it cannot be expected it would lucrative as other Health Naturally stores. Thus the statement stated by the vice president of Health Naturally is flawed and dubious and ramifications may be different to the expected ones.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 262, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this health' or 'these healths'?
Suggestion: this health; these healths
...ir business. But there may be the case, these health and fitness stores have been establishe...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 555, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...but also to the other towns and cities. Also there may be only one or two shops of h...
^^^^
Line 5, column 178, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ied. Initially what was the age group of the members at this local health store? ...
^^
Line 5, column 529, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...to some renovation and now it possesses a large number of facilities comparative to one present l...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 820, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...efits of the exercises they indulge in. Also the highest age group of people may be ...
^^^^
Line 7, column 409, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...ich is opposite to the children liking? Also if the fee for children is respectably ...
^^^^
Line 9, column 209, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ative as other Health Naturally stores. Thus the statement stated by the vice presid...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, thus, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 42.0 19.6327345309 214% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 25.0 11.1786427146 224% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 61.0 55.5748502994 110% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 16.3942115768 18% => More nominalization wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2854.0 2260.96107784 126% => OK
No of words: 580.0 441.139720559 131% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92068965517 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.90746259869 4.56307096286 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70547733496 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 254.0 204.123752495 124% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.437931034483 0.468620217663 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 887.4 705.55239521 126% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Interrogative: 3.0 0.471057884232 637% => Less interrogative sentences wanted.
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 19.7664670659 142% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.5620471489 57.8364921388 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.928571429 119.503703932 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.7142857143 23.324526521 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.78571428571 5.70786347227 49% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.238508186414 0.218282227539 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.076588203646 0.0743258471296 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0703420075482 0.0701772020484 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.161900148011 0.128457276422 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0312456442393 0.0628817314937 50% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 14.3799401198 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.06 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 126.0 98.500998004 128% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.