One year ago, Glengood Health Center in Turnville decided to start a health awareness program for its community. Since that time, Glenwood's share of patients in the Turnville area has significantly increased. Further, a nationwide survey indicates that m

Essay topics:

One year ago, Glengood Health Center in Turnville decided to start a health awareness program for its community. Since that time, Glenwood's share of patients in the Turnville area has significantly increased. Further, a nationwide survey indicates that many people in the country are greatly interested in such awareness programs. Citing these facts, the director of Carson Health Center in Poway has recommended that Carson should also start health awareness programs of its own to attract more patients from its community.

The author states that, the nationwide survey indicates that many people in country are greatly interested in health awareness programs. Therefore, the director of Carson Health Center in Poway recommends that Carson should also start health awareness programs to attract more patients from its community. The author's recommendation is seriously flawed, therefore the author needs to answer some questions before the recommendation is accepted. The questions which are needed to be answered are mentioned in following paragraphs.

First, the author states that the Glengood Health Center in turnville, one year ago, started a health awareness program for its community. After that health awareness program the share of patients in turnville area has significantly increased. Author only mentioned that share of the patients in the Turville area is significantly increased. But, what is number of increase in the patients? The author did not mentioned that number. Is the increase in patients is 10 percent or 50 percent. Because, between the 10 percent of the 1000, and the 50 percent 100, second one does not indicate any great number of increase.

Second, the author also states that the nationwide survey indicates that many people in the country are greatly interested in such awareness programs. Does the nationwide survey done personally meeting the people or done on the internet? Because, the nationwide survey by personally meeting survey would be localized. And the internet survey would have been done only on the health care related website. Because, most people who search on the maintaining physic would be only surfing on the health care websites, so the people who interested in health awareness programs should be in great number.

Third, the author further states that, the Carson Health center in Poway should also start health awareness programs of its own to attract more patients from its community based on the survey. Does the nationwide survey's results would apply for the Carson Health care center in Poway? Absolutely not, because the people in the area of the Poway might not be interested in any Health awareness programs. And also the results of the nationwide survey would not be apply for the localized programs.

Therefore, the author's recommendation is based on the wrong assumptions and recommendation should be evaluated thoroughly before accepting.

Votes
Average: 5 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 311, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...t more patients from its community. The authors recommendation is seriously flawed, the...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 140, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “After” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...th awareness program for its community. After that health awareness program the share...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 411, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'did' requires the base form of the verb: 'mention'
Suggestion: mention
...ase in the patients? The author did not mentioned that number. Is the increase in patient...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 464, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t number. Is the increase in patients is 10 percent or 50 percent. Because, betwe...
^^
Line 3, column 580, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... the 50 percent 100, second one does not indicate any great number of increase. ...
^^
Line 5, column 239, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ing the people or done on the internet? Because, the nationwide survey by personally me...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 16, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...e localized programs. Therefore, the authors recommendation is based on the wrong as...
^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'if', 'second', 'so', 'therefore', 'third']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.285024154589 0.25644967241 111% => OK
Verbs: 0.154589371981 0.15541462614 99% => OK
Adjectives: 0.06038647343 0.0836205057962 72% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0628019323671 0.0520304965353 121% => OK
Pronouns: 0.00966183574879 0.0272364105082 35% => OK
Prepositions: 0.13768115942 0.125424944231 110% => OK
Participles: 0.0531400966184 0.0416121511921 128% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.75271308591 2.79052419416 99% => OK
Infinitives: 0.00966183574879 0.026700313972 36% => Some infinitives wanted.
Particles: 0.0 0.001811407834 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.115942028986 0.113004496875 103% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.024154589372 0.0255425247493 95% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00966183574879 0.0127820249294 76% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2397.0 2731.13054187 88% => OK
No of words: 375.0 446.07635468 84% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 6.392 6.12365571057 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40055868397 4.57801047555 96% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.466666666667 0.378187486979 123% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.304 0.287650121315 106% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.226666666667 0.208842608468 109% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.170666666667 0.135150697306 126% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75271308591 2.79052419416 99% => OK
Unique words: 142.0 207.018472906 69% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.378666666667 0.469332199767 81% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 39.062466586 52.1807786196 75% => OK
How many sentences: 21.0 20.039408867 105% => OK
Sentence length: 17.8571428571 23.2022227129 77% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.0617190402 57.7814097925 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.142857143 141.986410481 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.8571428571 23.2022227129 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.380952380952 0.724660767414 53% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 3.58251231527 195% => Correct essay format wanted or double check grammar & spelling issues after essay writing.
Readability: 48.2571428571 51.9672348444 93% => OK
Elegance: 2.09574468085 1.8405768891 114% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.445373439069 0.441005458295 101% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.217701435135 0.135418324435 161% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.129197575602 0.0829849096947 156% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.623226890267 0.58762219726 106% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.117500215018 0.147661913831 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.201400997149 0.193483328276 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.144184827293 0.0970749176394 149% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.429681804571 0.42659136922 101% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.138248892446 0.0774707102158 178% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.276006100012 0.312017818177 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.139850674702 0.0698173142475 200% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.33743842365 144% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.87684729064 58% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.82512315271 104% => OK
Positive topic words: 10.0 6.46551724138 155% => OK
Negative topic words: 4.0 5.36822660099 75% => OK
Neutral topic words: 5.0 2.82389162562 177% => OK
Total topic words: 19.0 14.657635468 130% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
---------------------
Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.