A recent study reported that pet owners have longer, healthier lives on average than do people who own no pets. Specifically, dog owners tend to have a lower incidence of heart disease. In light of these findings, Sherwood Hospital should form a partnersh

Essay topics:

A recent study reported that pet owners have longer, healthier lives on average than do people who own no pets. Specifically, dog owners tend to have a lower incidence of heart disease. In light of these findings, Sherwood Hospital should form a partnership with Sherwood Animal Shelter to institute an adopt-a-dog program. The program would encourage dog ownership for patients recovering from heart disease, which should reduce these patients' chance of experiencing continuing heart problems and also reduce their need for ongoing treatment. As a further benefit, the publicity about the program would encourage more people to adopt pets from the shelter. And that will reduce the incidence of heart disease in the general population.

The author of this argument claims that people can decrease the incident heart disease if they have a dog as a pet. To justify this recommendation, the author cites the following facts. (1) Based upon recent a study which indicates the possibility of disease in pet owners is lower than that of those who do not have a pet. (2) Sherwood hospital implement adopt-a-dog program which is beneficial for patients suffer from heart disease. (3) This program encourages people to take a pet from a shelter.

First, the author provides no assurance that the survey on which the argument depends is statistically reliable. In fact, the argument does not mention about the number of respondents, their occupation, or their ages. It is entirely possible that all people who took part in the study were younger, so the rate of heart disease between them is low. Hence, if the number of survey’s respondents was too low, or they are not representative of the overall population of general people, the author cannot rely on it to conclude that having a pet can affect people healthy positively.

Second, base on the fact that pet owners are healthier than others, the author infers that a dog can help patients to recover after heart problems. However, in is not necessarily the case. It is possible. The patients may have allergy attitude to the dog and this can intensify their ailment. Since the author does not provide more evidence it is no reasonable to generalize the result of a survey to all people.

In third place, the argument relies on the assumption that respondents are healthy because of the pet. However, it is quite possible that their healthy was due to other factors such as their occupation, where they live, low stress, healthier foods, and even their age. Indeed, people who participated in the survey can live in a village that people’s meals comprise of lower fat foods and more vegetables. Without considering this scenario, the author cannot justify the conclusion that people are healthier in order to have a pet.

Finally, the author assumes that program can encourage people to take a dog from the shelter. Although it is may the dog help people to be live longer, it is only can not be the cause that people take a dog. Perhaps people are not in the proper economic condition, and they cannot afford a dog or pay costs of maintaining it in the home. In addition, some people like to live in the silence environment, while having a dog in the home is contrary to their desire.

To sum up, the argument is logically flowed and therefore, unconvincing as it stands. To strengthen the argument, the author should provide more information about respondents, and effects of pets on patients who suffer from heart disease. To evaluate the recommendation, we should know about all effective factors in this matter.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 294, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Since” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...g and this can intensify their ailment. Since the author does not provide more eviden...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 348, Rule ID: IT_IS_NO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'not' or 'now'?
Suggestion: not; now
...or does not provide more evidence it is no reasonable to generalize the result of ...
^^
Line 7, column 363, Rule ID: COMPRISE_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'comprise' or 'consist of'?
Suggestion: comprise; consist of
...e in a village that people's meals comprise of lower fat foods and more vegetables. Wi...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 240, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...patients who suffer from heart disease. To evaluate the recommendation, we should ...
^^

Discourse Markers used:
['finally', 'first', 'hence', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'second', 'so', 'then', 'therefore', 'third', 'while', 'as to', 'in addition', 'in fact', 'such as', 'to sum up']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.249090909091 0.25644967241 97% => OK
Verbs: 0.14 0.15541462614 90% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0745454545455 0.0836205057962 89% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0454545454545 0.0520304965353 87% => OK
Pronouns: 0.04 0.0272364105082 147% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.123636363636 0.125424944231 99% => OK
Participles: 0.0127272727273 0.0416121511921 31% => Some participles wanted.
Conjunctions: 2.75545171842 2.79052419416 99% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0290909090909 0.026700313972 109% => OK
Particles: 0.00181818181818 0.001811407834 100% => OK
Determiners: 0.123636363636 0.113004496875 109% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0254545454545 0.0255425247493 100% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0163636363636 0.0127820249294 128% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2839.0 2731.13054187 104% => OK
No of words: 484.0 446.07635468 109% => OK
Chars per words: 5.86570247934 6.12365571057 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69041575982 4.57801047555 102% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.357438016529 0.378187486979 95% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.254132231405 0.287650121315 88% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.173553719008 0.208842608468 83% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.103305785124 0.135150697306 76% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75545171842 2.79052419416 99% => OK
Unique words: 216.0 207.018472906 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.446280991736 0.469332199767 95% => OK
Word variations: 50.3975538592 52.1807786196 97% => OK
How many sentences: 25.0 20.039408867 125% => OK
Sentence length: 19.36 23.2022227129 83% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.169638367 57.7814097925 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 113.56 141.986410481 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.36 23.2022227129 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.68 0.724660767414 94% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.14285714286 117% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 3.58251231527 112% => OK
Readability: 44.7732231405 51.9672348444 86% => OK
Elegance: 1.70967741935 1.8405768891 93% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.24590179933 0.441005458295 56% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.111780969353 0.135418324435 83% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0651759879998 0.0829849096947 79% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.552226069416 0.58762219726 94% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.121426507842 0.147661913831 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.104971764584 0.193483328276 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0752203210656 0.0970749176394 77% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.440090429164 0.42659136922 103% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0791421615831 0.0774707102158 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.179144471688 0.312017818177 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.063049702692 0.0698173142475 90% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.33743842365 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 6.87684729064 174% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.82512315271 124% => OK
Positive topic words: 6.0 6.46551724138 93% => OK
Negative topic words: 12.0 5.36822660099 224% => OK
Neutral topic words: 4.0 2.82389162562 142% => OK
Total topic words: 22.0 14.657635468 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 70.83 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.25 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.