A recent study shows that people living on the continent of North America suffer 9 times more chronic fatigue and 31 times more chronic depression than do people living on the continent of Asia. Interestingly, Asians, on average, eat 20 grams of soy per day, whereas North Americans eat virtually none. It turns out that soy contains phytochemicals called Isoflavones, which have been found to possess disease-preventing properties. Thus, North Americans should consider eating soy on a regular basis as a way of preventing fatigue and depression.
At first glance, it seems that soy can help North Americans to decrease chronic fatigue and depression. But, when we peruse this argument closely, author has missed some important points that make the conclusion look dubious. In the passage below, I will shed some light on the wrong arguments used by the author to reach the conclusion.
First of all, author has mentioned that Asians eat 20 grams of soy a day, whereas North Americans eat virtually none. Author also mentions that soy contains phytochemicals called Isoflavones, which have been found to possess disease-preventing properties. Yes, it is true that chronic fatigue and chronic depression are type of diseases, but it is not specifically mentioned that soy helps to prevent these disease. May be, soy helps to reduce the risk of heart-attack or any other disease. Just by knowing that soy has disease-preventing properties, it cannot be concluded that lower fatigue and depression in Asians is due to soy. It should also be established against which diseases soy is helping, only then it can be suggested that to reduce depression and fatigue, soy should be eaten regularly.
Author also failed to take into consideration various factors such as climate. Fatigue and depression can happen due to cold weather also. In Asia, there is abundant sunlight around most of days in a year. May be exposure to sunlight is lowering the depression and fatigue rate. Fatigue may happen due to lower calcium in our body and vitamin D is required for bones to absorb calcium. Low exposure to sunlight also makes people gloomy and sullen. This may be the cause of high depression and fatigue among people of North America. Author also need to study these factors and should compare apples with apples before coming to the conclusion.
There may be other platitude of reasons for 9 times more fatigue and 31 times more depression among North Americans when compared to Asians. In Asia, culture of fast food is still not that prevalent. Here, people still prefer to eat home food, may be this difference between eating fast food is the cause of depression and fatigue. Unhealthy fast food is not the source of vitamins and minerals required by our body to make it function properly. Fast food do contain high salt and sugar content. Author needs to check these facts also. These may be the reason for higher depression and fatigue among North Americans.
Therefore, to reach a conclusion by taking into account only soy is not prudent. Author should take into account various factors such as different food habits, environment, hereditary etc. to reach to a sound conclusion. It cannot be justified that disease-preventing properties of soy will help in reducing depression and fatigue.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 402, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this disease' or 'these diseases'?
Suggestion: this disease; these diseases
...lly mentioned that soy helps to prevent these disease. May be, soy helps to reduce the risk o...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 134, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
...pression can happen due to cold weather also. In Asia, there is abundant sunlight ar...
^^^^
Line 5, column 183, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the days') or simply say ''most days''.
Suggestion: most of the days; most days
...Asia, there is abundant sunlight around most of days in a year. May be exposure to sunlight ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 531, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
...tent. Author needs to check these facts also. These may be the reason for higher dep...
^^^^
Line 9, column 249, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... conclusion. It cannot be justified that disease-preventing properties of soy wil...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, look, may, so, still, then, therefore, whereas, such as, first of all, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 11.1786427146 161% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 16.3942115768 24% => More nominalization wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2293.0 2260.96107784 101% => OK
No of words: 455.0 441.139720559 103% => OK
Chars per words: 5.03956043956 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.61852021839 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.784569416 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 204.123752495 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.476923076923 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 704.7 705.55239521 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Interrogative: 1.0 0.471057884232 212% => OK
Article: 0.0 8.76447105788 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 19.7664670659 142% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.3385051888 57.8364921388 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 81.8928571429 119.503703932 69% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.25 23.324526521 70% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.67857142857 5.70786347227 64% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 16.0 6.88822355289 232% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.20098728767 0.218282227539 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0548433342461 0.0743258471296 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0613117010848 0.0701772020484 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.101995108871 0.128457276422 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0501190156808 0.0628817314937 80% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.4 14.3799401198 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 48.3550499002 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 12.197005988 69% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.66 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.69 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 98.500998004 95% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.