The regional brand manager sent the following memo to the national brand manager for Sun-Beem Facial Cleanser.
“We need to institute a huge publicity campaign for the launch of Sun-Beem’s improved formula. Without an enormous media blitz, including television, radio, internet, and magazine ads, potential new customers will not be aware of our product. And previous customers will not be aware that Sun-Beem’s new, non-carcinogenic formula is on the shelves. The best way to combat the negative publicity Sun-Beem’s old formula received is to fight fire with fire, by using the media’s insatiable interest in any new news about Sun-Beem to sell the new formula. This will erase the negative connotations in the minds of former customers, and will ensure that Sun-Beem is once again the best-selling facial cleanser on the market.”
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument
The above argument is about the advances in advertising field that the regional brand manager feels necessary to make public aware about the launch of Sun-Beem’s improved formula. atahe argument is based on the strong assumption that media is the only way to replace the negative view of customers on Sun-Beem Facial Cleanser.
The argument's main flaw is lack of logical facts and statistic figures to evident the economic state of downfall of Sun-Beem Facial Cleanser. Since the argument is just in the view of a regional manager may be the down fall was only in the particular region due to some fallacies and not all over the nation. In that case adoption of this suggestion will be a squandering.
Secondly, the assumption that media advertisement can evade out the negative impacts on Sun-Beem Facial Cleanser is dubious fact. People can not be easily deceived and may be if this new launch is done without proper tests it may again turn out to be blemish on the brands name which will cause severe down turn of the enterprise.
Thirdly, the regional manager may be correct with his idea on the advertisement. But the argument must be bolstered with the evidences showing that there is a national wide decline in Sun-Beem Facial Cleanser's economic activity, which is the first and foremost requirement to bring out any immediate reforms. And also survey must be made among other regional centres and opinion should be collected from other regional managers to invest large amount on advertisement sector.
The argument will also be made strong if it provides some ideas for affective media approach. This ideas can also be collected as a result of survey from all over nation's branches of Sun-Beem Facial Cleanser. And most importantly the customer views about the launch of new product and their mishap with old can be surveyed and compiled. When these negatives are expurgated from the product and if that is boasted in the advertisement it would definitely change the people's negative attitude as the region manager mentions.
To summarize, in order to make the argument more sensible the above mentioned evidences and reports and surveys and opinion must be attached with the it. And in case, if this fallacies are not scrutinised then the amendment of argument's assumption may cause a lot of revenue to go in vain.
Sentence: The argument's main flaw is lack of logical facts and statistic figures to evident the economic state of downfall of Sun-Beem Facial Cleanser.
Description: The tag an adjective is not usually followed by the
Suggestion: Refer to evident and the
Sentence: This ideas can also be collected as a result of survey from all over nation's branches of Sun-Beem Facial Cleanser.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to This and ideas
Sentence: And most importantly the customer views about the launch of new product and their mishap with old can be surveyed and compiled.
Description: The fragment with old can is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace old with adverb
Sentence: To summarize, in order to make the argument more sensible the above mentioned evidences and reports and surveys and opinion must be attached with the it.
Description: The tag an adjective is not usually followed by the
Suggestion: in order to make the argument more sensible, the above ...
Sentence: And in case, if this fallacies are not scrutinised then the amendment of argument's assumption may cause a lot of revenue to go in vain.
Error: scrutinised Suggestion: scrutinized
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 391 350
No. of Characters: 1909 1500
No. of Different Words: 191 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.447 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.882 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.589 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 139 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 110 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 83 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.067 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.523 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.337 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.58 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.061 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5