The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of movie-rental stores.
"Because of declining profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore's ten movie-rental stores. Raising prices is not a good option, since we are famous for our low prices. Instead, we should reduce our operating hours. Last month our store in downtown Marston reduced its hours by closing at 6:00 p.m. rather than 9:00 p.m. and reduced its overall inventory by no longer stocking any DVD released more than five years ago. Since we have received very few customer complaints about these new policies, we should now adopt them at all other Movies Galore stores as our best strategies for improving profits."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In this memorandum, the author concludes that the owner should adopt new policy that Galore stores should decrease their operating expenses to all other Movies Galore. This argument seems logical at first glance, but there are pieces of evidence that does not account for the validity of the conclusion.
First of all, the author needs to provide solid evidence on the last month Movie Glaore in downtown. He believes that shortening the closing time is to help a reduction of the operating expenses. However, it is possible that customers are actually not aware of this changed policy because it has been implemented about a month. Then, this might eventually does not really affect any operating expenses of Galore. Furthermore, reduction of any DVD released more than five years ago might cause another existing customers, such as elderly and some of classic moviegoers. Therefore, any reduction of closing time and of DVD that had been released more than five years would not reduce operating expenses.
Secondly, the author needs to supplement the argument with concrete information whether few customer complaints are marginal. If there are only marginal number of existing customers complain about new policy, then this is not marginal and thus it is significant that the owner should cancel new policies. Furthermore, even if very few customer complaints are marginal, that does not mean that the owner should adopt new policies to all other stores since the inherent characteristics of all other Galore stores might be different from Galore store in downtown. For example, store in downtown reap profits from new policies, but it could be possible that all other stores do have the same consequences such as closing early time. There could be potential customers who work until 6 P.M. and usually go to Galore store, but if they close early, then profits will decrease. Therefore, only one store in downtown cannot be generalized as all Galore stores.
Lastly, the author should provide more specific evidence on the soundness of the conclusion. If Movie Galore decreases operating expenses, it would cause income to decrease and thus decrease profits. Therefore, there is no causal relationship between declining profits and reducing operating expenses.
The argument are unconvincing on many grounds. To bolster the argument, the author should rule out the other possibilities aforementioned above.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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In this memorandum, the author concludes...
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...for the validity of the conclusion. First of all, the author needs to provid...
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...would not reduce operating expenses. Secondly, the author needs to supplement...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e generalized as all Galore stores. Lastly, the author should provide more s...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...ts and reducing operating expenses. The argument are unconvincing on many gr...
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Line 9, column 19, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
...erating expenses. The argument are unconvincing on many grounds. To bolste...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, furthermore, however, if, lastly, really, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, thus, for example, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.5258426966 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.4196629213 121% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 14.8657303371 61% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.3162921348 97% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 33.0505617978 70% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 58.6224719101 68% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 12.9106741573 93% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2041.0 2235.4752809 91% => OK
No of words: 383.0 442.535393258 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.32898172324 5.05705443957 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.42384287591 4.55969084622 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70264626722 2.79657885939 97% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 215.323595506 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.493472584856 0.4932671777 100% => OK
syllable_count: 647.1 704.065955056 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.740449438202 0% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.2370786517 94% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.20387795 60.3974514979 75% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.421052632 118.986275619 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.1578947368 23.4991977007 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.52631578947 5.21951772744 144% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 7.80617977528 77% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 10.2758426966 68% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 5.13820224719 117% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.138265587232 0.243740707755 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0436923350764 0.0831039109588 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0497640481031 0.0758088955206 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0830298498558 0.150359130593 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0545674758047 0.0667264976115 82% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 14.1392134831 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.8420337079 87% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.1743820225 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.63 12.1639044944 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.13 8.38706741573 97% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 100.480337079 85% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.8971910112 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.7820224719 119% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.