The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.

Essay topics:

The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.

The graph illustrates information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries

Firstly,took the graph it shows how to use water in worldwide the usage of water in 3 ways domestic use,industrial use and agricultural use in this graph x-axis shows years and y-axis shows km.

Secondly,in the whole century the domestic usage of water is constant in mid of the century remaining period gradually increased but it settled on 300 km.The industrial usage of water is also stable in half of the century rest of the period slowly raised but it resolved on 900 km.But the agricultural usage of water is regularly increased and it reached at top 3000 km.

Thirdly,according to table brazil has only 176 million population the irrigated land has 26.500 km but the huge consumption of water per person that is 359 m coming to Democratic republic of congo it has 5.2 million population and huge irrigated land 100 km but the consumption of water per person is only 8m.

Finally,the huge different between two countries that is consumption of water according to graph agricultural usage of water is huge in comparing another two usages.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories
IELTS

Comments

flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 40 21.0 (Don't forget punctuation marks)

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 5 10
No. of Words: 200 200
No. of Characters: 946 1000
No. of Different Words: 91 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.761 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.73 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.731 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 61 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 48 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 36 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 40 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 19.215 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.595 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 1 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.234 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4

Well, you will need to do some changes to get higher marks.
Follow the suggestions, you will see great difference:

1, try to put a space after all punctuation marks.

2, try to put punctuation marks properly. This will make content well organized.

3, put more words for task II. and follow this pattern:

Para 1: introduction.

Para 2:First,reason 1 (1 sentence) + why reason 1(some arguments. 2-3 sentences) + examples for reason 1 (around 2 sentences) + small conclusions (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1, 1-2 sentences).

Para 3:Second,reason 2 ,blabla... do the same thing like First

Para 4:Third, reason 3 blabla... do the same thing like First but shorter

Para 5: Conclusion.

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