The pie charts below give information about world population in 1900 and 2000 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

Essay topics:

The pie charts below give information about world population in 1900 and 2000.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagrams show how world population was distributed by geographical areas in 1900 and 2000. The first difference one can recognise is in the shocking growth of global population, from 1.6 billion to 6 billion (almost +400%). About geographical areas, the most population in both cases lived in Asian continent (more than 50%), with Europe at second place.

A relevant difference between 1900 and 2000 data was int he proportion among geographical areas. If North America remained stable as areas classified as "Others" (respectively 5% and 3%), the proportion change to what concern Europe, Latin America & Caribbean, Africa. In more detail, Europe decreased its percen incidence from 25% to 14% whereas Latin America and Africa increased prominently from 3% and 4% to respectively 8% and 16%.

The most interesting difference from 1900 and 2000 data is related to African continent population. The growth from 4% to 16% (if we consider both "Africa" and "Middle East and North Africa") shows us how this geographical areawill have a strong impact in 21st century global society and economy. At last, considering that data shown are in percentage, it is important to remember how nowadays demographic arguments should keep focused on Asian population, with its approximately 4 billion inhabitants.

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Average: 6.3 (3 votes)
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Sentence: The first difference one can recognise is in the shocking growth of global population, from 1.6 billion to 6 billion almost 400.
Error: recognise Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: In more detail, Europe decreased its percen incidence from 25 to 14 whereas Latin America and Africa increased prominently from 3 and 4 to respectively 8 and 16.
Error: percen Suggestion: percent

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 8.0 out of 9
Category: Excellent Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 205 200
No. of Characters: 1046 1000
No. of Different Words: 126 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.784 4.0
Average Word Length: 5.102 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.961 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 79 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 57 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 42 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 34 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.778 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.63 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.556 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.43 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.609 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.13 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4

'discourse makers' is not a issue for you since it is less than 0.7. For you, firs of all, don't refer something new from the graphs, second, still need to improve the language.

You can read some samples and compare:

better to have 4 paragraphs:

para 1: introduction
para 2: body 1
para 3: body 2
para 4: conclusion

sample:
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or
para 1: introduction
para 2: conclusion
para 3: body 1
para 4: body 2

sample:
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