Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The advancement in technology has a great impact in the innovation of medical stream and providing new health services. These services make people to have longer life and the expectancy of lives become longer .The government passed the rule that people who are working at a certain stage should be retired.But these depend on various factors.

Firstly,some older people are facing many health problems like cardiovascular ,B.P and diabetics because of these they could not concentrate in their work moreover,these people need rest for more time.If the old people is financially weak and cannot afford money for their home expenses . Then the company management should expand their years and only make them to do little work .for example my uncle who is recently worked in NSTL and got retired because of his financial problems the company offered him a job to do clerk post so,it is a easy task to do which reduce the stress for the older people and prevent from health problems.

Secondly,even though he is full of vibrant due to outdated of his age.There will be reduce in his mental stability for them.If they had retired for their work those older people are interested in their job the work should be limited for them.If the health conditions are severe the should take voluntary retirement or after their service they are not expected to do work .

In conclusion government should increase the job extension under certain conditions . It should also provide some self employment schemes such that it will be beneficial for living expenses.

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Average: 8.5 (4 votes)
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Sentence: If the health conditions are severe the should take voluntary retirement or after their service they are not expected to do work .
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to to and outdated
Description: The token the is not usually followed by a modal auxillary
Suggestion: Refer to the and should

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Don't put a space before punctuation marks.
Always put a space after punctuation marks. E-rater is sensitive.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 266 350
No. of Characters: 1264 1500
No. of Different Words: 153 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.039 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.752 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.432 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 95 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 58 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 36 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.58 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.857 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.425 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.76 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.174 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5