13. Most business people are only motivated by the desire of money.

Essay topics:

13. Most business people are only motivated by the desire of money.

Nowadays, people are trying to expand their knowledge, gain experince and acquire essential skills in order to be able to establish their own businesses. When it comes to business matter, controversy surrounds the issue of whether money is just a motivator factor among business people which makes them have their own businesses or not. Some people are of the opinion that respect and status will not be gained unless people have substancial money and business people are not exception. I believe, however, there are other contributing factors which require these people to have factory, company and other kinds of business.

One of the most interesting aspects of the current discussion which demands a keen contemplation is that the feeling of donation and philanthropy contribute to earning more money among businessmen. Most of them have strong inclination to help needy people and the poor area. In fact, they believe that improving the living condition of the poor is their responsibilities. For example, three months ago, I watched an Italian movie, which was about inventing new drugs by a Fischer company. The head of this company made attempt to patent new drugs so that he could enhance the value of the company's market share. The reason why he wanted to earn considerable profit was allocating more money for African people who suffered form AIDS and other fatal diseases. This brins him the sense of self-satisfaction that he was seeking for. However, at first glance, it seemed how greedy this person was. Therefore, we cannot consider them as greedy ones.

Another noteworthy aspect of the ongoing discussion which needs to be reflected is that passion for the field they have studied can result in running their own companies. Many professors at university study hard and carry out researches. They might sacrifice whole their lives for such experiments and discoveries. By passing times, they will be able to find new formulate for practical and new products. In order to benefit societies, they produce that products at their own factories, which results in having a self-sufficiet society. Although they would get more money if they imported such products from other countries, they refuse import goods in order to make serious contribution to their own societies. Without having such stong feeling of love for their jobs, they could not contribute to the society.

To sum up, having the sense of philanthropy and being passionate about their fields are the results of running the company for businessmen. I hope that all people do not regard businessmen as evil who always have thirst for money.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

The head of this company made attempt to
The head of this company made an attempt to

Sentence: Nowadays, people are trying to expand their knowledge, gain experince and acquire essential skills in order to be able to establish their own businesses.
Error: experince Suggestion: experience

Sentence: Some people are of the opinion that respect and status will not be gained unless people have substancial money and business people are not exception.
Error: substancial Suggestion: substantial

Sentence: This brins him the sense of self-satisfaction that he was seeking for.
Error: brins Suggestion: bring

Sentence: Without having such stong feeling of love for their jobs, they could not contribute to the society.
Error: stong Suggestion: sting

flaws:
More sentences varieties wanted. Look, a lot of sentences start with subject 'they'.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 427 350
No. of Characters: 2146 1500
No. of Different Words: 236 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.546 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.026 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.654 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 151 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 109 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 51 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.409 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.61 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.364 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.268 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.444 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.119 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5