Do you agree or disagree that government should not provide any financial support for artists?

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Do you agree or disagree that government should not provide any financial support for artists?

In modern day, people are too busy concentrating on their jobs to care about the importance of art in our society. Without art, how will it become in the world? We would live a better but more boring life, because art play an important role. Thus, in my opinion, I think that government should provide support for artists to help the whole society.

First, art can be the best tube for people to release themselves in leisure time. As I mentioned, people nowadays are burdened with lots of pressure from their work, family, and so on. However, if art works are supported with more financial budget, people can easily touch this field as their entertainment. For example, for workers, it is totally enjoyable for them to go to a painting exhibition on the weekend, which make them get rid of stress and anxiety. This help people to transfer their mood and when they go back to work, they will complete works more efficiently.

Secondly, if art can be advocated, more jobs opportunities will be in need. Because of the financial support, people will have more chance to join art. At the same time, the demand of art activities increases, causing more workers on it. For instance, including filmmakers, painters, musicians, are in need to produce more works for people to appreciate. Thus, it can bring a growth of economy.

Admittedly, some people think the amount of money can used in other fields, such as health care, transportation, which can make it more convenient in our physical life. However, art can not only provide physical help, but also mental improvement.

In conclusion, with the financial support provided by government, people can enjoy their life after tiring work, and, more people will be taken care of because of the need in more workers who can work for art. Therefore, although this budget can be used in other way, this is the best choice for government. So I definitely agree that governments should provide support for artists.

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Average: 7 (1 vote)
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because art play an important role.
because art plays an important role.

This help people
This helps people

For instance, including filmmakers, painters, musicians, are in need to produce more works for people to appreciate.
For instance, including filmmakers, painters, musicians, they are in need to produce more works for people to appreciate.

the amount of money can used in other fields
the amount of money can be used in other fields

art can not only provide physical help, but also mental improvement.
Description: Not only...but also is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2

Read a good grammar book.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 20 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 334 350
No. of Characters: 1559 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.275 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.668 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.504 2.4
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No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 75 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 45 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.579 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.946 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.737 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.335 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.539 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.08 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5