It should be the environment rather than economic development for the government to focus on. Do you agree or disagree?

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It should be the environment rather than economic development for the government to focus on. Do you agree or disagree?

The majority of people in their early to mid-twenties are under the illogical and stereotypical assumption that government should focus on economic development rather than the environment. This notion, however, does not reflect the stance that I hold and should be thought in a different light. I believe that it is important for government to focus on the environment because it enables to make a better environment and enrich people's lifestyle.

First, it is essential to think about make a better environment. This is because the government has imposed many new environmental regulations. Companies must follow these regulations or be subject to severe penalties, including steep fines and possible criminal charges. Therefore, companies now have a powerful incentive to avoid causing environmental damage. For example, the Australian government passed a new law in 1997 that includes strict penalties for companies that pollute bodies of water. If a company owns a factory that introduces harmful chemicals into rivers or lakes, it faces an immediate fine of up to one million dollars. In addition, the Australian government can charge the company over a hundred thousand dollars a day until the problem has been dealt with. As a result, the waters of Australia are much cleaner now than they were in the past, and their condition will continue to improve in the future.

Second, another important point that should be brought up is enriching people's lifestyle. More and more people are realizing that even small lifestyle changes can have positive effects on the environment by effort of government. Therefore, they are taking action to reduce the amount of pollution they create. My family is an excellent example of this trend. The government advertised about environmentally friendly lifestyles. After watching this advertisement, my family made several lifestyle changes to benefit the environment. My mother commutes to work by subway instead of by car, my father brings cloth bags to the grocery store so that he will not have to use plastic ones, and I stopped turning the air conditioner on in the summer. Many other people in my neighborhood watched the advertisement as well as followed its advice.

To sum up, new environmental rules have been created by the government, and a rising number of people are changing how they live to help the environment by the government's effort. In this regard, I maintain that focusing on environment is more needed than economic development for the government.

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because it enables to make a better environment and enrich people's lifestyle.
because it enables to make a better environment and enriches people's lifestyles.

it is essential to think about make a better environment
it is essential to think about making a better environment

by effort of government.
by the effort of government.

Therefore, they are taking action to reduce
Therefore, they are taking actions to reduce

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 23 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 403 350
No. of Characters: 2070 1500
No. of Different Words: 224 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.48 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.136 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.936 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 167 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 123 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 84 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 64 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.19 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.157 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.282 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.449 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.062 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5