TPO-05 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment-doing things they like to do-rather than doing things they should do.Use specific reasons and examples to suppo

Modern technology has changed perspective of people towards personal enjoyment compared to the viewpoint of people in the past. Some believe that modern people reluctantly carry on works they should complete and instead they like to spend more time on their personal hobbies. On the other hand, others have the opposite viewpoint, arguing that these days, people are more involved in their professional work and they cannot engage in their personal enjoyment. I agree with the former group, since advanced technology has eased the professional work and helped people to have more leisure time. This contributes to having more laid back people who do not like to do works needed a lot of energy.

To start with, advanced technology has made professional jobs much easier than the physical works in the past, resulting in a trend that people like to perform easy jobs. Most of jobs, are now performed with the help of advanced computers and automation systems. This means that it is not required to undertake physical activities to fulfil a handy job, which was common in the past. Moreover, technology has made jobs to be completed significantly quicker than the jobs in the past, going a long way towards the quality of modern people's life. Therefore, people are now more interested in their personal hobbies and pleasures. They prefer to be engaged in more automation jobs and less in physical works. In the past, if it was necessary to plant their domestic vegetables and fruits or to involve in animal husbandry, now all of their basic necessities are provided by national or international products, conveniently. These type of activities now is becoming like hobbies and people do gardening to spend their spare time rather than to suffice their food requirements.

In addition, nowadays, there are various kinds of leisure activities and technology has enabled people to have time to try things they prefer. Modern airplanes and automobiles have caused a tremendous reduction in trip time. Continental travel is now possible and travelling is now becoming fashion. People like to have more fun and visiting another country with different culture will help them to understand the world around them better. These days, there are various kinds of jobs and companies to the extent that job seekers can choose whatever job they like to apply. This option was rare in the past and people were limited to choose between available jobs. Furthermore, online communication software, like Facebook, has motivated youth to make new friends from different part of the globe which has encouraged them to enjoy their life more than spending their time doing some boring studies or work. Distance learning has also made education more convenient and students can choose between a huge range of universities and schools to continue their studies. People nowadays prefer to have choices for everything. They like to have different options for professional works, for their leisure activities, for sports and for shopping.

In conclusion, I am personally of the opinion that people are more engaged in personal enjoyment, inclining to have different options for everything from sport and leisure activities to availability of jobs. Technology has gone a long way towards providing more spare time for modern people who do not like to perform works which are told to be completed.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 67, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'easier' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: easier
...chnolgy has made professional jobs much more easier than the physical works in the past, re...
^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, if, moreover, so, therefore, in addition, in conclusion, to start with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 13.8261648746 159% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 92.0 52.1666666667 176% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2828.0 1977.66487455 143% => OK
No of words: 549.0 407.700716846 135% => OK
Chars per words: 5.15118397086 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.84053189512 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69446503121 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 259.0 212.727598566 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.471766848816 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 889.2 618.680645161 144% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.994623655914 0% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.6003584229 126% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.6442521864 48.9658058833 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.769230769 100.406767564 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.1153846154 20.6045352989 102% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.34615384615 5.45110844103 80% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.210709834187 0.236089414692 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0620835080885 0.076458572812 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0614203766677 0.0737576698707 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.14916222805 0.150856017488 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0398115032773 0.0645574589148 62% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 11.7677419355 114% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.59 10.9000537634 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.45 8.01818996416 105% => OK
difficult_words: 131.0 86.8835125448 151% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.