TPO-26 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parents’ jobs than to choose jobs that are very different from their parents’ job.Use specific r

The importance of jobs and people feeling secure and satisfied in their careers is evident for everybody. By having in mind that the children should not consider the fact that if their job is similar or different from their parents but whether they like the job or not. However, in my point of view, children who choose a job different from their parents are having a greater chance to be successful.

First and foremost, children who are having different jobs than their parents are more likely to be independent and well-rounded. This kind of child knows how to solve his own problems and don't rely on his parents to help him in every step of his life. Moreover, he will find other experts to help him and learn how to probe and tackle a problem by himself. By all of these, his network will grow and learn different new tools to help him. For instance, I chose the same path as my father, being a software programmer. I toke java programming course in my college, and used to ask my father every single question that I had about my projects and whenever I had to debug my program. Consequently, after that semester I realized that I did not learn very much as my father always helped me with my projects.

The second important reason is that, in a family that everybody has chosen the same career is not diverse in terms of jobs. Imagine there is a family that everybody is engineer as opposed to the one that has it all: doctors, engineers, chemists. It's obvious that this kind of family will be more helpful to each other. They can pass their knowledge to one another and be very advantageous. For instance, my brother who is an interior designer helped me decorate my house without me spending money to do so. So I think a family with different occupation is a very effective one.

To sum up, from the aforementioned ground, children it's a better strategy that children choose different careers in order to be helpful to each other and also make independent knowledgeable folks.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 190, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...knows how to solve his own problems and dont rely on his parents to help him in ever...
^^^^
Line 7, column 53, Rule ID: IT_IS[6]
Message: Did you mean 'it's' (='it is') instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
Suggestion: it's; it is
...rom the aforementioned ground, children its a better strategy that children choose ...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, however, if, moreover, second, so, well, for instance, i think, kind of, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 54.0 43.0788530466 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 45.0 52.1666666667 86% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1639.0 1977.66487455 83% => OK
No of words: 355.0 407.700716846 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.61690140845 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34067318298 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6002700789 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 212.727598566 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.532394366197 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 515.7 618.680645161 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 34.5969376808 48.9658058833 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.4117647059 100.406767564 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8823529412 20.6045352989 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.70588235294 5.45110844103 123% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.2568502524 0.236089414692 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0885030265236 0.076458572812 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.112787886397 0.0737576698707 153% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.177690954342 0.150856017488 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.143847996646 0.0645574589148 223% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.52 10.9000537634 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.3 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 60.0 86.8835125448 69% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.