TPO-09 - Integrated Writing Task Car manufacturers and governments have been eagerly seeking a replacement for the automobile's main source of power, the internal-combustion engine. By far the most promising alternative source of energy for cars is the hy

The reading and the lecture focus on different opinion about the merits and demerits of hydrogen-based fuel cell engine. In the reading, the writer states the advantages of hydrogen-based fuel cell and the government are looking for replacement the internal- combustion engine. According to the lecture, however, the speaker states that none of these advantages appears to be true. Nevertheless, the writer points out hydrogen need for fuel-cell engine is infinite, can not be depleted since we can get it from various resources, including gas and water, and is renewable while the petroleum needs to operate the internal combustion engine is soo limited resource. In addition, hydrogen-based fuel cell protects the environment from pollution since it product by using water not carbon dioxide which has a harm effect on the environment. Finally, fuel-cell engine is so cheap, the money needs to operate the fuel-cell engine less the money required to operate the internal combustion engine, the fuel-cell engine powered car requires half the amount of fuel that the internal-combustion powered car does to go the same distance.

On the other hand, the speaker presents a different side of the argument. According to the lecture , the speaker states that the government is optimistic regarding the hydrogen-fuel cell engine and he saw that these advantages are not to be work and there are some issues to support the idea. First of all, the hydrogen is not easily available, it is right that you can find in common substance like water but we need the hydrogen in pure state which it is hard to store and product, it is highly artificial, and it is need to be cooled at 200 c. thus, it is hard to manufacture it. So, it is not practical. Furthermore, using the hydrogen is not a way to solve pollution since when we need to produce pure hydrogen, it needs to pass through the purification process which needs energy by burning a high amount of cool and oil that pollute the environment. Finally, the hydrogen- based fuel cell is not cost saving. the production of hydrogen requires a highly expensive material platinum to let the hydrogen makes the chemical reaction to produce electricity to power the hydrogen cell engine. therefore, the hydrogen is not pragmatic.

Votes
Average: 6.9 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
The reading and the lecture focus on dif...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ed car does to go the same distance. On the other hand, the speaker presents ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 104, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...f the argument. According to the lecture , the speaker states that the government ...
^^
Line 3, column 747, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... pure hydrogen, it needs to pass through the purification process which needs ene...
^^
Line 3, column 803, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...on process which needs energy by burning a high amount of cool and oil that pollu...
^^
Line 3, column 924, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...en- based fuel cell is not cost saving. the production of hydrogen requires a highl...
^^^
Line 3, column 1103, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
...city to power the hydrogen cell engine. therefore, the hydrogen is not pragmatic.
^^^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'finally', 'first', 'furthermore', 'however', 'if', 'look', 'nevertheless', 'regarding', 'so', 'therefore', 'thus', 'while', 'in addition', 'first of all', 'on the other hand']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.256658595642 0.261695866417 98% => OK
Verbs: 0.174334140436 0.158904122519 110% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0871670702179 0.0723426182421 120% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0508474576271 0.0435111971325 117% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0363196125908 0.0277247811725 131% => OK
Prepositions: 0.0823244552058 0.128828473217 64% => OK
Participles: 0.0363196125908 0.0370669169778 98% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.91613892091 2.5805825403 113% => OK
Infinitives: 0.043583535109 0.0208969081088 209% => Less infinitives wanted.
Particles: 0.00242130750605 0.00154638098197 157% => OK
Determiners: 0.121065375303 0.128158765124 94% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00726392251816 0.0158828679856 46% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0121065375303 0.0114777025283 105% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2282.0 1645.83664459 139% => OK
No of words: 377.0 271.125827815 139% => OK
Chars per words: 6.05305039788 6.08160592843 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4064143971 4.04852973271 109% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.363395225464 0.374372842146 97% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.294429708223 0.287516216867 102% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.214854111406 0.187439937562 115% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.143236074271 0.113142543107 127% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91613892091 2.5805825403 113% => OK
Unique words: 179.0 145.348785872 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.474801061008 0.539623497131 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 50.15353786 53.8517498576 93% => OK
How many sentences: 14.0 13.0529801325 107% => OK
Sentence length: 26.9285714286 21.7502111507 124% => OK
Sentence length SD: 90.7159729877 49.3711431718 184% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 163.0 132.220823453 123% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.9285714286 21.7502111507 124% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.14285714286 0.878197800319 130% => OK
Paragraphs: 2.0 4.09492273731 49% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 3.39072847682 206% => Correct essay format wanted or double check grammar & spelling issues after essay writing.
Readability: 56.3715422509 50.5018328374 112% => OK
Elegance: 1.43518518519 1.90840788429 75% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.682940182952 0.549887131256 124% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.178899322847 0.142949733639 125% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0860679161638 0.0787303798458 109% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.595917340123 0.631733273073 94% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.153814535794 0.139662658121 110% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.353428422922 0.266732575781 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.13879040341 0.103435571967 134% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.696763496911 0.414875509568 168% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0 0.0530846634433 0% => Paragraphs are so close to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.620757433693 0.40443939384 153% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0989327518569 0.0528353158467 187% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 4.33554083885 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 4.45695364238 90% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.26048565121 117% => OK
Positive topic words: 4.0 3.49668874172 114% => OK
Negative topic words: 4.0 3.62251655629 110% => OK
Neutral topic words: 3.0 3.1766004415 94% => OK
Total topic words: 11.0 10.2958057395 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Less content wanted. Write the essay in 30 minutes.

Not in a correct format.

The correct pattern:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3

Less contents wanted from the reading passages(25%) but more content wanted from the lecture (75%).

Don't need a conclusion paragraph.

Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster

Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

flaws:
No. of Words: 376 250
Write the essay in 20 minutes.

Number of Paragraphs: 2 4

Not in a correct format.

The correct pattern:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3

Less contents wanted from the reading passages(25%) but more content wanted from the lecture (75%).

Don't need a conclusion paragraph.

Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster

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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 12 12
No. of Words: 376 250
No. of Characters: 1849 1200
No. of Different Words: 170 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.403 4.2
Average Word Length: 4.918 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.824 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 135 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 106 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 75 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 15.526 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.833 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.405 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.497 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.192 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 2 4