TPO No34
By the advent of new technology, most aspects of the human's life have been impacted. Obviously, the children's attitude to toward the education also changed. In my opinion, educating kids, because of the new devices such as cell phones, now is more difficult than it was in the past. In the following essay, I explain my reasons for this point of view.
first of all, children access to cell phones and social network media has a great impact on their attention in the classes. In fact, they have second resources to obtain information that they want, whether this kind of information is true or false, and so they pay less attention to what that is being taught in the schools. For example, my little brother who is going to school is allowed to have his phone in the school, and he always searches the material of the class on the internet. Although, this information most of the times, if not all, are not originated from a reliable source, he assumes them facts and does not follow his teacher's lead. Thus, access to additional information sources could be considered as a damaging factor in their learning proceeding.
Secondly, kids spend a big portion of their daytime with the new technology devices and do not study enough. Actually, nowadays, young people are totally occupied with this new stuff such as video games and forgot their primary purpose which is learning. As an example, when I was younger, a video game named SEGA emerged, and my father bought one them as a reward for studying hard in school. Sadly, I was addicted to playing with my SEGA and this playing hindered me from doing my homework. After a while, I was experiencing a big depression because I failed to pass two courses. So, my father took that video game away from me, although I was not willing in that, and again my scores gradually raised.
To conclude, I strongly believe that educating kids is a hard task for their teachers or parents. That is because they do not follow their teachers and rely on these new devices and because children spend most of their times with them and are not willing to study and keep pace with the class.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2018-10-25 | Mostafa1367 | 3 | view |
2018-10-25 | Mostafa1367 | 3 | view |
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 54, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'humans'' or 'human's'?
Suggestion: humans'; human's
... of new technology, most aspects of the humans life have been impacted. Obviously, the...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: First
...n my reasons for this point of view. first of all, children access to cell phones ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 758, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to proceed'.
Suggestion: to proceed
... as a damaging factor in their learning proceeding. Secondly, kids spend a big portion ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, first, if, second, secondly, so, thus, while, for example, in fact, kind of, such as, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 9.8082437276 10% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 48.0 43.0788530466 111% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 52.1666666667 88% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1756.0 1977.66487455 89% => OK
No of words: 376.0 407.700716846 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.67021276596 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40348946061 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.45318318539 2.67179642975 92% => OK
Unique words: 204.0 212.727598566 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.542553191489 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 529.2 618.680645161 86% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 38.2711144428 48.9658058833 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.294117647 100.406767564 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1176470588 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.58823529412 5.45110844103 139% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 11.8709677419 34% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.236089414692 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.076458572812 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0737576698707 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.150856017488 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0645574589148 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 58.1214874552 114% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.81 10.9000537634 90% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.21 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 86.8835125448 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.