The above memo is flawed in a number of ways and their recommendation holds good only when the following questions have been answered precisely.
New Ventures Consulting states that they discovered that there are currently no hobby shops in southeastern Grilldon. Have they visited each street?The above statement depends on the number of streets they visited in order to make this statement. To go through two to three streets in a town consisting of fifteen streets and make an assumption as above would be quixotic. A through analysis of each shop on each street would yield more results. A detailed analysis is to be presented to the president of HobCo Inc. for justification.
The company also states that the researched conducted a poll of area resident, out of which 88 percent indicated they would welcome the opening. The survey conduction might be flawed. Age matters and a detailed analysis of the age group preferring the opening of a hobby shop might be also noted. Does the survey taken include people of all age-groups and does it cover everyone in southeastern Grilldon? This would help find if everyone in the area would enjoy the opening of a hobby shop. While residents of one street might be interested, residents in another might not find it interesting and enjoyable. Hence survey must be taken for all the residents and must be not be assumed after a few streets.
The recommendation states that Grilldon is in a region of the nation in which the hobby business has increased by 300 percent during the past decade. Times change and so does the interests of people living in them. Does the interest still remain the same? A decade ago is indeed a long time ago. A poll must be taken in order to find out whether they still prefer hobby shops over other interests that lay amidst them.
The researches have also revealed that "Grilldon has a very large population of retirees, a demographic with ample time to devote to hobbies". How has this information been taken? If the company has just taken the number of retirees without considering the population, then this doesn't hold true. The ratio of retirees to the total number of residents must be taken. Also, do these retirees wish to spend their time on hobbies? A survey must be taken in order to prove this. The statement that they are retirees hence having ample time for hobbies doesn't hold true otherwise. Why, they might just want to stay at home and might have their own families to devote their time to.
Hence, the above questions must be answered in order to obtain the evaluate the recommendation. Only then, does it hold true and the shop will profit the company greatly.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 10, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
The above memo is flawed in a number of ways and t...
^^
Line 4, column 149, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...Grilldon. Have they visited each street?The above statement depends on the number o...
^^^
Line 4, column 376, Rule ID: THROUGH_THOROUGH[1]
Message: Did you mean 'thorough' (accurate, exhaustive)?
Suggestion: thorough
...ssumption as above would be quixotic. A through analysis of each shop on each street wo...
^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 610, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... not find it interesting and enjoyable. Hence survey must be taken for all the reside...
^^^^^
Line 10, column 290, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...t considering the population, then this doesnt hold true. The ratio of retirees to the...
^^^^^^
Line 10, column 559, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...ees hence having ample time for hobbies doesnt hold true otherwise. Why, they might ju...
^^^^^^
Line 12, column 64, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...ons must be answered in order to obtain the evaluate the recommendation. Only then, does it ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, hence, if, so, still, then, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 65.0 55.5748502994 117% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2225.0 2260.96107784 98% => OK
No of words: 459.0 441.139720559 104% => OK
Chars per words: 4.84749455338 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.62863751936 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64680508391 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 204.123752495 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.472766884532 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 688.5 705.55239521 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Interrogative: 1.0 0.471057884232 212% => OK
Article: 15.0 8.76447105788 171% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 19.7664670659 142% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => OK
Sentence length SD: 37.5812397857 57.8364921388 65% => OK
Chars per sentence: 79.4642857143 119.503703932 66% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.3928571429 23.324526521 70% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.39285714286 5.70786347227 24% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 8.20758483034 183% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.136866598094 0.218282227539 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0405160054484 0.0743258471296 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0597576717103 0.0701772020484 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0658201096042 0.128457276422 51% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0371553735655 0.0628817314937 59% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.6 14.3799401198 67% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 48.3550499002 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 12.197005988 69% => Flesch kincaid grade is low.
coleman_liau_index: 10.55 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.56 8.32208582834 91% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 98.500998004 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => Gunning_fog is low.
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to improve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.