“In the six months that I have been watching the employees, their productivity has increased by over 12 percent. Therefore, my recommendation is that the employees either be watched by, or think that they are watched by, an outside evaluator at all times

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“In the six months that I have been watching the employees, their productivity has increased by over 12 percent. Therefore, my recommendation is that the employees either be watched by, or think that they are watched by, an outside evaluator at all times from this point on.”

Businesses have to make very tough decisions in order to be successful. Many businesses usually consider many factors before making these decisions. That is why the recommendation that the employees of the firm need to watched, or think that they are being watched needs to be subject to more analysis before it is considered the best solution for this firm.

Although it seems that a 12% increase in productivity is meager, there needs to be comparison of this increase to previous years or months. What if the increase of 12% was two-fold better than the previous 6 months? If this is the ca...

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Sentence: That is why the recommendation that the employees of the firm need to watched, or think that they are being watched needs to be subject to more analysis before it is considered the best solution for this firm.
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to to and watched

flaws:
No. of Words: 698 350

It is on top list:
http://www.testbig.com/essay-categories/gmatgre

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 6
Category: Excellent Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 29 15
No. of Words: 698 350
No. of Characters: 3351 1500
No. of Different Words: 253 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.14 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.801 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.8 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 213 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 172 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 125 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 81 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.069 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.342 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.621 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.305 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.472 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5