The luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals.
I contend to the given statement that the high standard of living and opluent life abstain from developing truly strong and indepenndent individuals. I would agree to this statement that the people living in a family that can afford opluency, they might tend to more dependent and weak compared to the one that has been raised or living in a moderate family culture.
I would like to through some light upon this topic by elaborating this as, any person right from where he/she born, if he has seen all the luxuries around, got all the toys or other materialistic things. They haven't seen any of the hardships that are done to earn the money or the position, that they are enjoying righ now. They don't know how much labourious work it to make the toys or any other things. They develop a mindset that everything is easily available by money and as they grow up, they are introduced to the real world rather than, the reel world that they enjoyed when they were young.
After entering adolscent, they tend to depend on their parents or relatives for making themselves prove in this demanding and competitive market. Hence, they had the luxuries but weren't familiarized with the orginality or how this world works. They were more often get pampered by their expensive toys, but doesn't know their real value. They end up by a heck of a lot to understand in this world.
On the other side, A person with middle class background, As a child, they wouldn't get their new toys so easy. They didn't get whatever they demanded. As they passed their college's, they ran here and there for the job interviews. They have learnt hardship by seeing their parents work and also engaging on their own by themeselves. So, they have probably been defeated more times than a rich brat. Therefore, by these small defeats, they become strong, independent and tend to take their own responsibilties and that of their families too. In this case, a rich person's child would not be able to take his own reponsibilties, thinking of the whole family is a far away.
I would like to add a example of a Daimond Businessman from surat, India. He is running a daimond business in surat. He is among the richest person in surat. Recently, his son came back to india after graduating from a UK. He wanted to make his child aware of the hardships of life. So, he told his son to live in a village, which is located in south india. Irrespective of not knowing the language and the culture, his son accepted the challenge. His father had some conditions, He gave him only 7000rs., he has to stay their for 2 months and not continuing any job for more than 2 weeks. He accepted the challenge and went there. First few days he was stranded on the street wandered here and there because he didn't knew the language, so nobody gave him their house on rent. After some days he started learning the basic by hearing all people and he did almost 9-10 jobs in the span of 2 months, also worked at a bakery shop. The primary goal of the businessman was to eduate his child not in terms of having all the bookish knowledge but to step out in the real world and experience hardships, managing money, how to live in when there is less amount of money. After his son came back to surat, he was more confident and could withstand any adverse breakdown.
I would like to conclude that any person that experiences hardships would be able to gain confidence by his own. Hence that i strongly agreed and proved by the above points that the hardships at times will not be so benign but you will reap your hardship in terms of freedom from dependence and would grow out a lot stronger than your previously were.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...living in a moderate family culture. I would like to through some light upon t...
^
Line 3, column 116, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...any person right from where he/she born, if he has seen all the luxuries around, ...
^^
Line 3, column 211, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: haven't
...oys or other materialistic things. They havent seen any of the hardships that are done...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 331, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
..., that they are enjoying righ now. They dont know how much labourious work it to mak...
^^^^
Line 3, column 407, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...t to make the toys or any other things. They develop a mindset that everything is ea...
^^^^
Line 5, column 180, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: weren't
...arket. Hence, they had the luxuries but werent familiarized with the orginality or how...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 259, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... or how this world works. They were more often get pampered by their expensive to...
^^
Line 5, column 309, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...t pampered by their expensive toys, but doesnt know their real value. They end up by a...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 76, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: wouldn't
...ddle class background, As a child, they wouldnt get their new toys so easy. They didnt ...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 117, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...ouldnt get their new toys so easy. They didnt get whatever they demanded. As they pas...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 561, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...heir families too. In this case, a rich persons child would not be able to take his own...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 21, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...y is a far away. I would like to add a example of a Daimond Businessman from s...
^
Line 9, column 713, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...reet wandered here and there because he didnt knew the language, so nobody gave him t...
^^^^^
Line 11, column 114, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... be able to gain confidence by his own. Hence that i strongly agreed and proved by th...
^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'hence', 'if', 'so', 'therefore', 'as to']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.191988950276 0.240241500013 80% => OK
Verbs: 0.169889502762 0.157235817809 108% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0732044198895 0.0880659088768 83% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0552486187845 0.0497285424764 111% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0911602209945 0.0444667217837 205% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.114640883978 0.12292977631 93% => OK
Participles: 0.0483425414365 0.0406280797675 119% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.45151842903 2.79330140395 88% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0317679558011 0.030933414821 103% => OK
Particles: 0.00552486187845 0.0016655270985 332% => OK
Determiners: 0.0939226519337 0.0997080785238 94% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0165745856354 0.0249443105267 66% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0165745856354 0.0148568991511 112% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3665.0 2732.02544248 134% => OK
No of words: 660.0 452.878318584 146% => OK
Chars per words: 5.55303030303 6.0361032391 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.06857624559 4.58838876751 110% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.269696969697 0.366273622748 74% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.180303030303 0.280924506359 64% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.133333333333 0.200843997647 66% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0848484848485 0.132149295362 64% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.45151842903 2.79330140395 88% => OK
Unique words: 317.0 219.290929204 145% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.480303030303 0.48968727796 98% => OK
Word variations: 60.664012585 55.4138127331 109% => OK
How many sentences: 32.0 20.6194690265 155% => OK
Sentence length: 20.625 23.380412469 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.3761692645 59.4972553346 95% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.53125 141.124799967 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.625 23.380412469 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.25 0.674092028746 37% => More Discourse Markers wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.94800884956 121% => OK
Language errors: 14.0 5.21349557522 269% => Correct essay format wanted or double check grammar & spelling issues after essay writing.
Readability: 38.6553030303 51.4728631049 75% => OK
Elegance: 1.12227074236 1.64882698954 68% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.242910741715 0.391690518653 62% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.119049889228 0.123202303941 97% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0711591129644 0.077325440228 92% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.490514118332 0.547984918172 90% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.140863532174 0.149214159877 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0826843744277 0.161403998019 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0827347127461 0.0892212321368 93% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.31279652658 0.385218514788 81% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0599584448225 0.0692045440612 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.145500357681 0.275328986314 53% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0624744259786 0.0653680567796 96% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.4325221239 163% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.30420353982 57% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.88274336283 246% => Less neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 12.0 7.22455752212 166% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 3.66592920354 82% => OK
Neutral topic words: 5.0 2.70907079646 185% => OK
Total topic words: 20.0 13.5995575221 147% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
---------------------
Less content wanted. Write the essay in 30 minutes.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.