The chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of the telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002.
The chart gives information about the telephone calls, divided by categories, in the UK from 1995 to 2002. Units are measured in billions of minutes.
Overall, Local-fixed line experienced the highest usage in UK in the given period. However, after 1999, Local-fixed line was falling until 2002. Also, Mobiles were the lowest among the others telephone calls but it significantly increased after 7 years. Moreover, National and international-fixed line were increasing from the beginning of the year, 1995 to 2002.
It is evident that Local- fixed line was the top telephone calls in the UK with about 70bm while National and international and Mobiles were approximately 37bm and 3bm respectively. Local-fixed line rose up steadily from 1995 to 1999 with about 20bm. In term of National and international-fixed line, it was a steady increase with about 20bm after 7 years.
On the other hand, Mobiles were the least with less than 5bm calls in the UK. With regards to Mobiles, between 1999 to 2002, there was a sharp increase with approximately 35bm. At the end of the year, Local-fixed line still popular in the UK with 70m as opposed to 60bm and 40bm for National and International –fixed line and Mobiles.
Sentence: Also, Mobiles were the lowest among the others telephone calls but it significantly increased after 7 years.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to others and telephone
it was a steady increase
it has a steady increase
Local-fixed line still popular
Local-fixed line is still popular
flaws:
You did very well for the introduction and conclusion, but not for graphs in details.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 12 10
No. of Words: 201 200
No. of Characters: 978 1000
No. of Different Words: 104 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.765 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.866 4.6
Word Length SD: 3 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 51 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 47 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 31 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 21 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.75 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.597 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.438 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.632 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.105 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4