The map below is of the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the supermarket.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
You should write at least 150 words.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
The diagram is the place known as Garlsdon. It portrays the two location sites suited for the supermarket.
Let us take a closer look at the country of Garlsdon having the overall population of 65,000. Garlsdon, has another town Hindon, which was situated 12 kilometers away from the industrial area, that composed of 10,000 people, and it is where the first possible site for the supermarket to be constructed, it is in the northern part of Garldon. Moreover, Bransdon follows with a total number of 15,000 population and around 16 kilometers in the south-eastern part of the country. Lastly, Cransdon, which is 25 kilometers away and it is located in the south-western part of the country with 29,000 population.
In addition, the first possible site for the supermarket was in Hindon, which is an industrial area, and has a portion of a housing area, and it is almost near the main roads and railway. However, targeted population in this area is less. Meanwhile, the second possible site was in the center of Bransdon and Cansdon. It is a bit far from the main roads but the railway intersects the place. Indeed, it shows a favorable location, not only when it comes to industrial area, but to the housing community as well.
In sum, second possible site appears to be the ideal site for the supermarket, since both towns have numerous population to serve with. Lastly, we can for-see an estimated inclined in the revenue if only this site will be chosen.
Garlsdon, has another town Hindon, which was situated 12 kilometers away from the industrial area, that composed of 10,000 people
Garlsdon has another town Hindon, which was situated 12 kilometers away from the industrial area and composed of 10,000 people
not only when it comes to industrial area, but to the housing community as well.
Description: Not only...but also is not used properly.
since both towns have numerous population to serve with.
since both towns have numerous populations to serve with.
we can for-see an estimated inclined
we can foresee an estimated inclination
Sentence: Lastly, we can for-see an estimated inclined in the revenue if only this site will be chosen.
Error: for-see Suggestion: foresee
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2 //still have grammar issues
You didn't put punctuation marks properly. Can you re-write this sentence and put punctuation marks correctly?
'Garlsdon, has another town Hindon, which was situated 12 kilometers away from the industrial area, that composed of 10,000 people, and it is where the first possible site for the supermarket to be constructed, it is in the northern part of Garldon.'
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 13 10
No. of Words: 251 200
No. of Characters: 1172 1000
No. of Different Words: 124 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.98 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.669 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.643 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 83 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 63 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 44 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.308 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.587 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.846 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.355 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.588 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.099 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4