Research indicates that the characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experience we may have in our life.
Individual people 's characters are shaped by two elements, hereditary points and social ones. Pro-hereditary elements believe that it has more impact on anyone's personalities,however some opponents disagree. I as a social proponent will state some reasons in this essay about this case.
There is no dout that community has a great impact on personalities. Society = life and life is an advanture journey with different experience and experiences in every life stages. For instance, having a strong personality in worse moments of life, being punctual , sympathetic or creative are some vital features in people which are taught during this period.
In addition, even talents in anyone should be discovered to use it. Micheal Pheleps , Swimming Olympic Champion , is an example of this case. . Although his physiological aspects was transmitted from his parents such as having arms as longer as normal , this feature was discovered to make such a unique person like him.
However, scientificaly physiological aspects, such as hight, eyes' and hair's colour , some illnesses like cancer or diabetes and etc. transmit to people more than moral points. It may be influence people's characters a little bit , but they can not be the most important elements in individual's personalities. Imagine a person with lots of favourable physical congenital elements for being a wonderful soccer player . If this person bring up in a poor cultural family or society , never ever can catch a proper personality to be a successful player in future.
To sum up, moral characters which obtain through experience and experinces in public might be more influential and powerful element in anyone's life.
talents in anyone should be discovered to use it
Description: 'it' refers to what?
Although his physiological aspects was transmitted
Although his physiological aspects were transmitted
It may be influence people's characters
It may influence people's characters
If this person bring up
If this person brings up
might be more influential and powerful element in anyone's life.
might be a more influential and powerful element in anyone's life.
might be more influential and powerful in anyone's life.
Sentence: Society = life and life is an advanture journey with different experience and experiences in every life stages.
Error: advanture Suggestion: adventure
Sentence: However, scientificaly physiological aspects, such as hight, eyes' and hair's colour , some illnesses like cancer or diabetes and etc. transmit to people more than moral points.
Error: hight Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: scientificaly Suggestion: scientifically
Sentence: To sum up, moral characters which obtain through experience and experinces in public might be more influential and powerful element in anyone's life.
Error: experinces Suggestion: experiences
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 264 350
No. of Characters: 1376 1500
No. of Different Words: 168 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.031 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.212 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.926 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 114 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 78 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 58 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.857 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.22 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.313 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.6 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.059 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5