Some educationalists argue that non-exam, art-based subjects, such as music, drama, art and craft, should be compulsory in the secondary-school curriculum. They believe that activities such as these can improve overall academic performance.To what extent

Essay topics:

Some educationalists argue that non-exam, art-based subjects, such as music, drama, art and craft, should be compulsory in the secondary-school curriculum. They believe that activities such as these can improve overall academic performance.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is true that extracurricular subjects tend to be interesting curricula among second-grade students. While some educationalists believe that these subjects could bring great encourage to improve general curricula which are a must, I think there are other views should be coped.

Generally, school has been ruled to represent compulsory subjects; language and science, and these subjects are general subjects which should be taken examination in secondary school. Not only general subjects but also non-exam and drama; music, drama, craft are part of curricula, but these subjects do not require compulsory national curriculum finals.

Based on educationalists opinion, non-exam and art-based subjects also should be justified as well as compulsory subjects. It is because they believe that these curricula could stimulate student to overhaul the general subjects.

Indeed, students are pleased by doing art or drama for a long time in school, because these subjects might their hobby or talent. On the contrary, schools consider that including non-exam and art will to be compulsory subject could deliver student to peak schedule because all subject will be taken final exams. For instance, a group of students who do drama, they need about three or four hours to take exercise before performance. Some schools think that this subject could build creativity and friendship for each pupil, but to success this activity will spend too much time. By contrast, students should use their time to prepare themselves to pass compulsory finals. This means student’s lesson will be complex and unorganized.

Accordingly, I think that although doing extracurricular subjects could bring well-being and enrich academic point for students, they have to focus on compulsory national curriculum finals, so making non-exam and art subject as mandatory subjects tends to bring disorganized study for pupils.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)

Comments

because these subjects might their hobby or talent.
because these subjects might be their hobby or talent.

including non-exam and art will to be compulsory subject could deliver student to peak schedule
Description: two verbs in one sentence

I think there are other views should be coped.
I think there are other views which should be coped.

Sentence: Based on educationalists opinion, non-exam and art-based subjects also should be justified as well as compulsory subjects.
Sentence: Based on educationalists opinion, non-exam and art-based subjects also should be justified as compulsory subjects did.

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2

Still you have grammar issues. Read a good grammar book.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 289 350
No. of Characters: 1569 1500
No. of Different Words: 157 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.123 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.429 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.765 2.4
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No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 98 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 72 40
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Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.231 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.229 7.5
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Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.091 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5