some people think that professional athletes make good role models for young people, while others believe they do not. Discuss both side.

Essay topics:

some people think that professional athletes make good role models for young people, while others believe they do not. Discuss both side.

These days many people who likes watching sports by real life or by television. Watching any kind of competition of sports are always quite impressive, interesting and need strong emotional when it has final part of the competition. Some professional athletes make good role models for young people but others they do not believe it. Although, I strongly agree that many top athletes are given a role model to the young children who has to be become future world champion. There are some advantages and disadvantages been good athletes make good role models for young children.

First of all, the children could be responsible for their life. For instance, sports teach them impassibility which is quite hard for everyone to be like this. Because, all sports demands you need to work hard as much as you can. Furthermore, professional athletes make them encourage and give them to be brave. When a young person watches their favorite athletes on the television, they will try to follow them and imagine about top athletes themselves as well . Generally, most professional athletes became a champion by following their structure, history of success their old champions. Definitely, it will continue to the future's young athletes.

On the other hand, there are also professional athletes to make bad role models for the new generations. A good of illustration of this is top athletes are using bad trick when they have a important game. They can not play honest and also they even circumvent for audience. They doing this because of the money i guess. That will influenced young children to become good athletes.

To conclusion, although some professional athletes make badly but others make the better in the future.

Votes
Average: 5 (1 vote)

Comments

These days many people who likes watching sports by real life or by television.
Description: what is the verb for this sentence? can you re-write this sentence?

Watching any kind of competition of sports are always quite impressive,
Watching any kind of competition of sports is always quite impressive,

but others they do not believe it.
but others do not believe it.

many top athletes are given a role model to the young children who has to be
many top athletes are given a role model to the young children who have to be

There are some advantages and disadvantages been good athletes make good role models for young children.
Description: two verbs in one sentence. can you re-write this sentence?

professional athletes make them encourage
professional athletes make them encouraged

Sentence: Generally, most professional athletes became a champion by following their structure, history of success their old champions.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by a determiner, possessive
Suggestion: Refer to success and their

A good of illustration of this is top athletes are using bad trick
A good illustration of this is that top athletes are using bad tricks

Sentence: That will influenced young children to become good athletes.
Description: The word will is not usually used as a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to will

Sentence: For instance, sports teach them impassibility which is quite hard for everyone to be like this.
Error: impassibility Suggestion: impossibility

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2

Read a good grammar book.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 9
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 283 350
No. of Characters: 1400 1500
No. of Different Words: 154 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.102 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.947 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.664 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 89 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.722 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.009 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.556 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.332 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.495 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.11 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5