In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility.What are your opinions on this?

The issue of whether or not children should be engaged in paid jobs has drawn public attention. Generally speaking, kids are supposed to be well educated and protected before they grew mature enough to deal with difficult tasks. Therefore, I contend that kids should not be allowed to work for money, instead, they should develop their knowledge and skills in general schools or vocational schools.

Firstly, an regular job require certain level of productivity which is usually too tough for a kid to achieve. To be more specific, salary is consist of the profit workers made, therefore, kids have to work as hard as their salary standard. Secondly, jobs for beginners are normally labour related and it is no doubt too demanding for a kid. An original meaningful job special designed for educated a kid can turn out be a pure labour sweatshop in the end.

Furthermore, non of the workplace is child-friendly design. All the desks and chairs are higher than children's need. Not to mention the various hazard happens during the work like pollution, chemicals, and heavy machine, can also damage a kid both in mental and physical health. Nothing is more important than security children's safety.

In conclusion, disadvantages for hiring underage workers are outweigh the advantages. Consider all the working demands and workplace safety requirements, allow children to work in early age can lead a negative impact to children. A better way to provide a skillful education is to send the kids to vocational school which are designed for protected education.

Votes
Average: 6.7 (1 vote)

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 14, Rule ID: WHETHER[7]
Message: Perhaps you can shorten this phrase to just 'whether'. It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
Suggestion: whether
The issue of whether or not children should be engaged in paid jobs...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 10, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...ols or vocational schools. Firstly, an regular job require certain level of pr...
^^
Line 3, column 143, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'consisted'.
Suggestion: consisted
...achieve. To be more specific, salary is consist of the profit workers made, therefore, ...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 62, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'outweighed'.
Suggestion: outweighed
...antages for hiring underage workers are outweigh the advantages. Consider all the workin...
^^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'first', 'firstly', 'furthermore', 'if', 'second', 'secondly', 'so', 'therefore', 'well', 'in conclusion', 'in general', 'no doubt']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.232081911263 0.247107183377 94% => OK
Verbs: 0.174061433447 0.155533422707 112% => OK
Adjectives: 0.109215017065 0.0946595960268 115% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0682593856655 0.0501214627716 136% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0204778156997 0.0437548338989 47% => OK
Prepositions: 0.0853242320819 0.122226691241 70% => OK
Participles: 0.0511945392491 0.0403226058552 127% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.83788188768 2.80594681477 101% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0409556313993 0.0326793684256 125% => OK
Particles: 0.00341296928328 0.00163938923432 208% => OK
Determiners: 0.0784982935154 0.0861772015684 91% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0238907849829 0.021408717616 112% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00682593856655 0.011925033212 57% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 1574.0 1933.35771543 81% => OK
No of words: 256.0 316.048096192 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 6.1484375 6.12580529183 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.0 4.20517956788 95% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.421875 0.374742101984 113% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.3203125 0.28420135186 113% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.21875 0.203846283523 107% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.1328125 0.137316102897 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83788188768 2.80594681477 101% => OK
Unique words: 159.0 176.037074148 90% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.62109375 0.56093040696 111% => OK
Word variations: 67.296180025 60.7387585426 111% => OK
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0891783567 87% => OK
Sentence length: 18.2857142857 20.7743622355 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 34.2765612782 49.517814964 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.428571429 127.492653851 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2857142857 20.7743622355 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.928571428571 0.814263465372 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38877755511 91% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 3.99599198397 100% => OK
Readability: 50.3169642857 49.1944974215 102% => OK
Elegance: 1.4025974026 1.69124875643 83% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.193605840975 0.332605444948 58% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0565231155675 0.102741220458 55% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0465209060501 0.0668466124924 70% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.516676894584 0.534860350844 97% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.0990993307311 0.148594505496 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0780023152003 0.134430193775 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0341221977297 0.0742795772207 46% => The sentences are too close to each other.
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.224703868105 0.324371583561 69% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0441954755346 0.0638462369009 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.128926675319 0.228012699653 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.00813272439942 0.058150111329 14% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.68436873747 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.41683366733 59% => OK
Positive topic words: 7.0 5.90881763527 118% => OK
Negative topic words: 2.0 2.5751503006 78% => OK
Neutral topic words: 1.0 1.9629258517 51% => OK
Total topic words: 10.0 10.4468937876 96% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.