In the past, sporting champions used to be motivated primarily by the desire to win a match or to break world records. These days they are more likely to be motivated by prize money and the opportunity to be famous.
What message does this send to young people and how does this attitude to sport affect the sports themselves?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In the midst of the materialism and consumerism era, some proponents opine that sporting awards are used to stimulate the players with the desire to beat enemies or break the previous highest rank whereas these rewards in the present day are replaced by precious materials such as money and reputation. In this essay, I will analyze the meaning of the above statements and cite the influence of sports on sports players.
First and foremost, these precious awards can encourage more youngsters can register in sports competitions. Wining a bunch of money can support the young to get by the financial hardships in their life while still having healthy mental and physical health from practicing sports daily. Secondly, the valuable prize can make the youngsters feel like it is worth the time and effort that they have sacrificed. Thirdly, however, the materialistic meaning of the reward can make young people assume that winning is everything and undermine the true value of sports. For example, some sports candidates in sports events such as Olympics, Sea Games,... misbehave once playing in order to beat and hurt the opponent contestant purposefully.
Considering the effect of these materialistic rewards on sports themselves, it is evident that it can widespread the fame of sports events and attract more players to practice sport on a daily basis. Admittedly, it can make society ease the negative phenomenon such as sedentary lifestyle, and obesity,... whereas its trend still has some drawbacks. Needless to say, the sports themselves might lose their true meaning. If sporting champions are no longer used to encourage mainly by the desire to win a match or beat the top record, they might not truly find the skilled players who immerse in these by passion and ambition. Moreover, sports contestants might become more aggressive and have the wrong tactic with the rival team in order to take home first prize. Finally, people are no longer playing sports for entertainment or stress relief and just concentrating on the value of the prize which might pressurize the sports players.
In conclusion, this social phenomenon can be in both positive and negative directions. Nevertheless, I personally contend that this modification can mitigate the sports morale of the player, and its setback might outweigh the benefit.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 644, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , .
...ports events such as Olympics, Sea Games,... misbehave once playing in order to be...
^^
Line 5, column 302, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , .
...such as sedentary lifestyle, and obesity,... whereas its trend still has some draw...
^^
Line 7, column 163, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'sports'' or 'sport's'?
Suggestion: sports'; sport's
...that this modification can mitigate the sports morale of the player, and its setback m...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, however, if, moreover, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, still, third, thirdly, whereas, while, for example, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 13.1623246493 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 7.85571142285 191% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 10.4138276553 173% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 7.30460921844 96% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 24.0651302605 108% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 41.998997996 105% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.3376753507 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1964.0 1615.20841683 122% => OK
No of words: 376.0 315.596192385 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.22340425532 5.12529762239 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40348946061 4.20363070211 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76769585305 2.80592935109 99% => OK
Unique words: 204.0 176.041082164 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.542553191489 0.561755894193 97% => OK
syllable_count: 592.2 506.74238477 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 3.0 2.52805611222 119% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 16.0721442886 106% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 60.7690619702 49.4020404114 123% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.529411765 106.682146367 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1176470588 20.7667163134 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.76470588235 7.06120827912 124% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.213310700101 0.244688304435 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0627355828762 0.084324248473 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0430748138005 0.0667982634062 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.125069296248 0.151304729494 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0208406937952 0.056905535591 37% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 13.0946893788 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 50.2224549098 98% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 11.3001002004 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.0 12.4159519038 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.05 8.58950901804 105% => OK
difficult_words: 103.0 78.4519038076 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 9.78957915832 138% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.7795591182 130% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.