In response to “Human beings are improving, despite fears of moral collapse”

Essay topics:

In response to “Human beings are improving, despite fears of moral collapse”

In the article “Human beings are improving, despite fears of moral collapse” (2012), Peter Singer believes that human’s ability to reason can lead to a moral progress, despite the manifestation of moral collapse nowadays. Firstly, he asserts that the capacity to reason is a significant advantage of human that acts like an escalator which takes people to places they have ever imagined. Secondly, he argues that the decline of violence is fundamentally due to human’s reasoning. Thus, he concludes that reasoning is the main root that leads to the fall of murder rate, which entails moral progress. In my opinion, while his argument seems logical generally, some of his points are not essentially persuasive.

Initially, Singer claims that the ability to reason is a leading advantage of human because it helps increase survival chance. This claim is true as suggested by White (2011), human reasoning is the ability to make better decision, which leads to higher chance of survival because the process of natural selection tends to favor those with better decision. Then, he likens the ability to reason as an escalator, which takes people to places that they never expect to reach. In fact, people can expect the place where they need to get out of the escalator; therefore, this is a false analogy. The author thus should make a more precise comparison for the role of reasoning ability to improve his argument.

Next, Singer suggests the crucial cause of declining violence rate is the rise of human’s reasoning, which is flawed because of the following reasons. Firstly, he does not give a proper definition for the word “violence” but explicitly assumes that the dropping murder rate is also the decrease in violence rate. As stated by Advameg Inc. (2012), violence is the use of physical force to damage property or injure people; moreover, violence may appear under various aspects such as domestic, community, power and media. Since murder rate is just one of those, from its decline, it cannot be concluded that violence has decreased in general. As a result, the author should provide such appropriate evidences that cover crucial aspects of violence to make his conclusion more convincing. Secondly, by referring to the Flynn effect, he claims that the crucial factor that causes the rise of IQ is the rising human’s abstract reasoning. This explanation is somehow biased because in fact, IQ tests primarily take into account linguistics, mathematical and logical intelligence (Brooks, n.d.); thus, the ability to reason is not the only contributor to the resulting IQ. Moreover, according to Cohen (2012), there are plenty of factors that affect IQ such as the environment that a person was brought up, the childhood nutrition and the heredity from parents. Therefore, rising human’s reasoning is not persuasively a main cause of higher IQ. Thirdly, there are many factors contributing to the decreasing violence rate, in which the human’s reasoning may not be the most important one. According to Haq (2010), a tough and proactive police system together with strict incarceration policies have played a significant role in reducing the violent rate. Another report from Dorish (2009) suggests that one of the most critical causes of declining violence rate is the economy state, which is reflected by inflation rate and welfare policy. In all, the claim that declining violence rate is because of human’s reasoning is biased and lacks objectivity; a more objective assessment on a wider basis is, thus, needed to better the argument.

Additionally, the author assumes the declining violent rate correlates to moral progress, which has no relation. This is because from his very first point, he defines moral progress is the expansion of circles of beings to whom people extend moral consideration. Moreover, this assumption is not right because such a moral progress not only consists of the decline of violence but also covers a wider spectrum. Therefore, it will be unjust and biased to conclude that morality is progressing merely because of the decline of violence rate. Nevertheless, Singer can make a more persuasive argument by giving a more appropriate definition and considering more relating evidences to support it, rather than relying merely on the declining violence rate.

In conclusion, even though some of Singer’s points are not convincing, he is able to make a true claim such as the claim of the leading role of reasoning. However, his claim, which states that the rising ability of human is responsible for the declining violence rate, needs objectivity. Finally, a wider range of consideration is necessary to conclude that declining violence entails the moral progress. Indeed, should more general assessments about the relation and the cause of the trend observed be incorporated, Singer’s argument would be a persuasive and influential one.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 704, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...soning ability to improve his argument. Next, Singer suggests the crucial cause ...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, however, if, may, moreover, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, third, thirdly, thus, while, in conclusion, in fact, in general, such as, as a result, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 39.0 13.1623246493 296% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 7.85571142285 153% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 10.4138276553 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 31.0 7.30460921844 424% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 50.0 24.0651302605 208% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 98.0 41.998997996 233% => Less preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 36.0 8.3376753507 432% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 4159.0 1615.20841683 257% => Less number of characters wanted.
No of words: 786.0 315.596192385 249% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.29134860051 5.12529762239 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.29487408139 4.20363070211 126% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91882490262 2.80592935109 104% => OK
Unique words: 345.0 176.041082164 196% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.43893129771 0.561755894193 78% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1329.3 506.74238477 262% => syllable counts are too long.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 5.43587174349 294% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 0.0 0.384769539078 0% => OK
Article: 9.0 2.52805611222 356% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 5.0 2.10420841683 238% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 13.0 4.76152304609 273% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 33.0 16.0721442886 205% => Too many sentences.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.1103882827 49.4020404114 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.03030303 106.682146367 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.8181818182 20.7667163134 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.57575757576 7.06120827912 93% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 17.0 3.9879759519 426% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 3.4128256513 147% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.271533623958 0.244688304435 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0745855365583 0.084324248473 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.118891416931 0.0667982634062 178% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.175050470737 0.151304729494 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.135909484251 0.056905535591 239% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 13.0946893788 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 50.2224549098 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 12.4159519038 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.45 8.58950901804 98% => OK
difficult_words: 183.0 78.4519038076 233% => Less difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 9.78957915832 123% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.