In some cultures children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough, it is reality, but not in all cultures. In this essay, I'm going to illustrate the benefit of this message to children and what is the drawbacks, which are not acceptable.

First of all, children are like mud, it can be used for making anything, any shape. So which message parents or teachers want to put into their brain, they can easily adopt. However, they fix their ambition by the message, without thinking is achievable or not. In that case, children can do many harder things which are usually not possible at their age. Nowadays we can see 7-9 years old little guys can work as professional programmers or professors, they can take classes in many universities, it's additionally remarkable. Moreover, it can happen only by the hard work and they work hard only for the suggestion.

On the other hand, all children are not perfect for doing any kind of job, at that time if they work hard and don't get any result, it is just only wasting the time, whatever they can do different things which can be good enough for their future. All men are not perfect in all things, so it is generally bad things if people expected more whatever they want from the child, as a matter of fact, the children can not concentrate more on his work. Sometimes disappointed to do any other work and does not trust in himself he can do anything.

In concludes, ii want to say, in my point of view is that sometimes children can do anything like a piece of cake, it's just a miracle or children are more interested in these things, that's why they could work hard on it, on the other hand, maximum youngsters are doing that, what their parents want and that traditionally painful for them.

Votes
Average: 5.6 (1 vote)

Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion: I'm
...but not in all cultures. In this essay, Im going to illustrate the benefit of this...
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Suggestion: don't
...job, at that time if they work hard and dont get any result, it is just only wasting...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ot trust in himself he can do anything. In concludes, ii want to say, in my poin...
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Suggestion: that's
...en are more interested in these things, thats why they could work hard on it, on the ...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, moreover, so, kind of, as a matter of fact, first of all, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 13.1623246493 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 7.85571142285 178% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 10.4138276553 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 7.30460921844 137% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 24.0651302605 158% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 34.0 41.998997996 81% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.3376753507 24% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1459.0 1615.20841683 90% => OK
No of words: 319.0 315.596192385 101% => OK
Chars per words: 4.5736677116 5.12529762239 89% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.22617688928 4.20363070211 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48464590565 2.80592935109 89% => OK
Unique words: 163.0 176.041082164 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.510971786834 0.561755894193 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 443.7 506.74238477 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.60771543086 87% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 5.43587174349 166% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.76152304609 189% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 16.0721442886 75% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.2975951904 128% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 76.5602522346 49.4020404114 155% => OK
Chars per sentence: 121.583333333 106.682146367 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.5833333333 20.7667163134 128% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.33333333333 7.06120827912 118% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.01903807615 80% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.67935871743 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.9879759519 125% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.379471041069 0.244688304435 155% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.157568801073 0.084324248473 187% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.120655039261 0.0667982634062 181% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.285436839473 0.151304729494 189% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.160724034299 0.056905535591 282% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 13.0946893788 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 62.01 50.2224549098 123% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 11.3001002004 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.52 12.4159519038 77% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.3 8.58950901804 85% => OK
difficult_words: 48.0 78.4519038076 61% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 9.78957915832 77% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.1190380762 123% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.7795591182 74% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.