In this democratic era, every vote counts to people who want to become the next leaders. Each vote would determine the shape and policy of the nations in several years to come. However, not all people have the right to vote. Most nations only allow citizens over the age of 18 to vote. Some people suggest the age constraint should be changed to 15 to reflect more diverse voters. Although this idea is plausible, allowing children over the age of 15 will probably backfiring.
First, children at the age of 15 still do not have enough maturity to vote. At this period, most of them still rely on their guardians. Furthermore, they are easily influenced by families, friends, or any other people. Their dependant behavior possesses a threat if they are allowed to vote. For example, they may vote a candidate just because their parents or friends vote the same person. This is not the essence of democracy. People should vote because of their personal wish and not being influenced by others. Not only that, candidates may easily bribe these children because of their lack of maturity. At some point in the future, this policy may work well because of the changing children behavior, but it is going to take some time to be implemented.
Second, these children have more important issues to think. In the period of age 15-18, children should focus more on school because they need to attend college. Their vote is not going to help them to admitted into top universities. Instead, they should study, do extra-curricular activities, and make positive achievements as a portfolio for university applications. Not only that, the decisions made by future political leaders do not have much influence on these children. This is why they do not have to focus their attention to vote yet, and should prioritize their own future.
By only including people over the age of 18 to vote, elections should already represent the whole nation. Although changing the age limit into 15 may reflect more groups, this may not change the outcome and substance of the election significantly. As a person who works in the education sector, I prefer to see these kids study for their own future.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 466, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'backfire'
Suggestion: backfire
...ildren over the age of 15 will probably backfiring. First, children at the age of 15 st...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, however, if, may, second, so, still, well, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 11.0286738351 36% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 32.0 43.0788530466 74% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1811.0 1977.66487455 92% => OK
No of words: 371.0 407.700716846 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.88140161725 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38877662729 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59771160428 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 188.0 212.727598566 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.506738544474 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 569.7 618.680645161 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 27.1890245422 48.9658058833 56% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 75.4583333333 100.406767564 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.4583333333 20.6045352989 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.29166666667 5.45110844103 60% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 13.0 4.88709677419 266% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.418628597608 0.236089414692 177% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.119243220247 0.076458572812 156% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.103654727965 0.0737576698707 141% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.277375933459 0.150856017488 184% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.108682707565 0.0645574589148 168% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.3 11.7677419355 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 58.1214874552 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 10.1575268817 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.73 10.9000537634 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.91 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 86.8835125448 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 65.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 19.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.