TPO-21 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school. Use specific reasons and examples to support your ans
There is no doubt that in today's world complexity, people put a lot of effort to succeed in their future career. The ability to relate with others is one thing that have an effective role in people's life. This brings up an arguable question: Is adeptness of communication with others more important than studying hard in school? Some people are incline toward that people will be succeed in their future profession, if they relate well to people, while others disagree with this viewpoint. As far as I'm concerned, I believe that studying hard and getting good grades at university courses is a valuable achievement. The reasons behind my standpoint are discussed in the following paragraphs.
To begin with, job market required from people to have specific knowledge. In fact, nowadays, most companies ask from their job candidates to show a degree from an internationally prestige college. Not only that, but also big companies such as Google or other companies in the manufacturing field such as car manufacturing wanted higher GPA from their applicants who like to employ on that firms. For example, when I was intending to apply to a car manufacturing in my country, the admission center of the factory has a policy that candidates should obtained the GPA of 3.5 out of 4 in their academic education. Additionally, individuals need to have specific information and experience at the specialized subjects because there are a huge amounts of employers that recruit people who could perform tasks that other people are not able such as operating devices including a milling machinery. Learning such knowledge is possible by attending in vocational centers and also by studying every hard. Therefore, studying hard is mandatory thing to be successful in future career.
The second and important reason that support my standpoint of studying well is that there are meager number of people who are expert in a certain topic. Indeed, they are a lot of people who could communicate with different subjects and they can easily exchange ideas with each other, whereas there are a few people even from educated people who could manage to do variety of responsibility. For instance, the management of the company, a person who want to be a manager must be skillful in various methods to increase rate of production in a manufacturing firms or s/he should have ability to organize workforce by giving them training. There are not many individuals who can show these abilities to the firms’ administrator because all of after-mentioned skill could not gain from relating with people they rather come from prolonged experiences and studying well during at a university courses. Hence, for success in future profession studying hard is of paramount importance since marketplaces have not adequate expert individuals.
In conclusion, according to above-mentioned reasons, I would contend that studying well in school and university have a significant importance, because job market required knowledge from people in order to employ them and also there are a few subjects who are expert in particular subject areas.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 501, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...disagree with this viewpoint. As far as Im concerned, I believe that studying hard...
^^
Line 2, column 741, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'amount'?
Suggestion: amount
...lized subjects because there are a huge amounts of employers that recruit people who co...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, second, so, therefore, well, whereas, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, in fact, in particular, no doubt, such as, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 15.1003584229 159% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 11.0286738351 190% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 43.0788530466 77% => OK
Preposition: 82.0 52.1666666667 157% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2609.0 1977.66487455 132% => OK
No of words: 503.0 407.700716846 123% => OK
Chars per words: 5.18687872763 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73578520332 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.97481015739 2.67179642975 111% => OK
Unique words: 258.0 212.727598566 121% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.512922465209 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 833.4 618.680645161 135% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 9.59856630824 42% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 71.5020872175 48.9658058833 146% => OK
Chars per sentence: 137.315789474 100.406767564 137% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.4736842105 20.6045352989 128% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.68421052632 5.45110844103 159% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.274171699817 0.236089414692 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0926654858461 0.076458572812 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0562284630615 0.0737576698707 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.165195173281 0.150856017488 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0705578811066 0.0645574589148 109% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.2 11.7677419355 138% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 58.1214874552 63% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 10.1575268817 144% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.12 10.9000537634 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.91 8.01818996416 111% => OK
difficult_words: 127.0 86.8835125448 146% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.