TPO-46 - Integrated Writing Task In the United States, medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms. However, there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which informa

The lecture points out the futility of reasons suggested in the reading article about the advantages of using electronic method of recording medical records over paper based method.

First, the reading claims that, the using electronic method to record patience data will help to reduce costs as storing papers will need more space. Also, it is easier to copy, transfer records from anywhere. However, the lecture argues that, there will be no significant cost saving if doctors switched from paper to electronic method. Usually doctors save paper records in case of emergency and for legal purposes.

In addition, the reading makes an argument that, there will be less chances of errors by using electronic method of recording. Bad handwriting, improper entry of information by human errors will be minimum. The lecture counters this point by stating, doctors still use papers during checkups and provide handwritten prescriptions. Office staff usually does the data entry in the computers and can make errors while entering the data.

Lastly, the reading passage argues that, retrieving large volume of data from anywhere through electronic system for research purposes is easier than retrieving it manually. The lecture refutes this claim by pointing out, there are strict privacy laws associated with medical records. Researchers need to get the permissions to access the data. No matter what form of data storage the doctors' use, they have to follow laws before releasing records. Moreover, the professor adds, patients can block records if they want to maintain their privacy.

In conclusion, the lecture disagrees with the reading article and states that electronic method of records storage does not provide advantages over paper based method.

Votes
Average: 8 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 64, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun chances is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...g makes an argument that, there will be less chances of errors by using electronic m...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, lastly, moreover, so, still, while, in addition, in conclusion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 10.4613686534 57% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 5.04856512141 178% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 7.30242825607 55% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 5.0 12.0772626932 41% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 12.0 22.412803532 54% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 30.3222958057 132% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 5.01324503311 80% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1492.0 1373.03311258 109% => OK
No of words: 274.0 270.72406181 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.44525547445 5.08290768461 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.0685311056 4.04702891845 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.50147806485 2.5805825403 97% => OK
Unique words: 154.0 145.348785872 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.56204379562 0.540411800872 104% => OK
syllable_count: 458.1 419.366225166 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.55342163355 109% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 3.25607064018 61% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.23620309051 121% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 2.5761589404 78% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 13.0662251656 115% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 21.2450331126 85% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.8309690891 49.2860985944 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.4666666667 110.228320801 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2666666667 21.698381199 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.86666666667 7.06452816374 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.09492273731 122% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 4.19205298013 24% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 4.33554083885 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 4.45695364238 157% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.27373068433 70% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.45472632102 0.272083759551 167% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.148606277174 0.0996497079465 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0744338140073 0.0662205650399 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.260513581876 0.162205337803 161% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.082812991536 0.0443174109184 187% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 13.3589403974 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 53.8541721854 83% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.0289183223 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.33 12.2367328918 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.31 8.42419426049 111% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 63.6247240618 130% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.7273730684 79% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.498013245 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.2008830022 80% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.