Do you agree or disagree with the following statement, Professional athletes, such football and basketball player, do not deserve the high salaries that they are paid.
Due to the huge salary gap between the professional athletes especially the sports star and the ordinaries, the professional athletes are widely considered overpaid. It has been a controversy that whether their salaries is too high. From my own perspective, those professional athletes definitely deserve it.
Firstly, the capability they have shown determines that they deserve what they gain. It's a common sense that not every soilder is qualified to be a general. That's the same in the sports field. Although their achievement may come from their talent or hard-working, they perform as the specialist in their field. Nobody should gain the high income if they do not. Take Liuxiang as an example, he has challenged the wold record of racing, we can safely define him a competitive athlete, there's no doubt that he deserve his high salary.
Secondly, It's their persistance and commitment that give them the ticket to gain the high salary. Nobody can easily succeed without the persistance and commitment. Undoubtedly, all the distinguished athletes has endure the hurt of practicing which must be seen as a disaster to the commen people. For example, the household athlete DengYaping in China, who has been world champion of pingpang. She has been praticed pingpang from an early age regardless of her untalented body for this kind of sports. Persistance and commitment are the most significant elements attribute to her success as she concluded.
Thirdly, the popular athletes will gain reputation for their country if they can get place on the world champion. We can imagine that if anyone become the winner of the swimming champion, we will be eagel to know where he or she come from. Actually, not only the country reputation but also the economic and the people will benefit from it. The sports star can advertise for the commodity, for example, the milk. Additionally, the people will emphasise on working out if they focus on the sports news. All in all, the play important role in enhancing the whole country.
In summary, the famous athletes gain as they paid. They have paid their talented ability, persistence as well as the commitment, more importantly, they are beneficial to the improvement of the whole country. I believe that they should be respected as the model of our society, for those who deny this should learn from them firstly.
Sentence: Take Liuxiang as an example, he has challenged the wold record of racing, we can safely define him a competitive athlete, there's no doubt that he deserve his high salary.
Description: The fragment he deserve his is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace deserve with verb, past tense
Sentence: Undoubtedly, all the distinguished athletes has endure the hurt of practicing which must be seen as a disaster to the commen people.
Description: A verb 'to have', present tense, 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to has and endure
Sentence: We can imagine that if anyone become the winner of the swimming champion, we will be eagel to know where he or she come from.
Description: The fragment anyone become the is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace become with verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Sentence: All in all, the play important role in enhancing the whole country.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to play and important
Sentence: Take Liuxiang as an example, he has challenged the wold record of racing, we can safely define him a competitive athlete, there's no doubt that he deserve his high salary.
Error: wold Suggestion: world
Sentence: Secondly, It's their persistance and commitment that give them the ticket to gain the high salary.
Error: persistance Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Nobody can easily succeed without the persistance and commitment.
Error: persistance Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Undoubtedly, all the distinguished athletes has endure the hurt of practicing which must be seen as a disaster to the commen people.
Error: commen Suggestion: common
Sentence: She has been praticed pingpang from an early age regardless of her untalented body for this kind of sports.
Error: praticed Suggestion: practiced
Sentence: We can imagine that if anyone become the winner of the swimming champion, we will be eagel to know where he or she come from.
Error: eagel Suggestion: eager
Sentence: Additionally, the people will emphasise on working out if they focus on the sports news.
Error: emphasise Suggestion: emphasize
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.25 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.868 7.5
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 390 350
No. of Characters: 1918 1500
No. of Different Words: 205 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.444 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.918 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.671 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 135 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 102 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.25 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.868 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.263 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.479 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.101 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5