The following appeared as a recommendation by a committee planning a ten-year budget for the city of Calatrava."The birthrate in our city is declining: in fact, last year's birthrate was only one-half that of five years ago. Thus the number of students en

The city committee set a policy recommendation about a ten-year budget plan which proposes to cut funding for education while increase budget for adult recreational facilities. The only evidence cited in the argument to bolster this budget plan is the declining birthrate in the city, and based on it, the speaker projected that students enrolled for public school would largely fall for next decade. In addition, the speaker think that the number of adults however, would go up, therefore he propose to support more programs primarily for adults. In fact, the lack of more concrete evidence to support the prediction of population constitution makes the whole plan not convincing.

First of all, merely by the fact that the birthrate is dropping cannot prove that the students enrolled in public school in the next decade would fall dramatically. The number of students enrolled in public school could be influenced by not only the domestic young people population, but also by people from nearby towns. It is possible that the student enrolled in the local school are partly from outside of the city, like from nearby area. Furthermore, it is also possible that more parents with kids who would be attend the local public school migrate to this city in the next decade. Besides, the competition between public school and private school would have impact on the number of students in public school, too. Therefore, in order to draw the conclusion about the student number for public school in next 10 years, the speaker obviously need to offer more evidence directly regarded to issues impact the school enrollment, like the possible factors discussed above.

Likewise, in terms of the number of adults, it is also an unconvincing forecast due to the absence of more evidences. This author failed to cite any evidence about why there would be more adults in the city whatsoever. Just because the falling of birthrates does not mean the increase of adults. Furthermore, even if the proportion of adults are growing gradually, it is still not reasonable to assume they would need more programs and facilities which are designed primarily for adults, considering we don’t know if there are already plenty of these which probably haven’t been used fully. It is possible that more there programs would simply be a waste of funding if they won’t be put into use.

To conclude, there need more evidence to support the projection about population of the city as well as the impact of population fluctuation on detailed budget plan.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 494, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'proposes'.
Suggestion: proposes
...ults however, would go up, therefore he propose to support more programs primarily for ...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, furthermore, however, if, likewise, so, still, therefore, well, while, in addition, in fact, as well as, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 66.0 55.5748502994 119% => OK
Nominalization: 21.0 16.3942115768 128% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2132.0 2260.96107784 94% => OK
No of words: 419.0 441.139720559 95% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.08830548926 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52432199235 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63976271361 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 196.0 204.123752495 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.467780429594 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 669.6 705.55239521 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.471057884232 0% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.1718557837 57.8364921388 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.25 119.503703932 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.1875 23.324526521 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.0 5.70786347227 158% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.182666857792 0.218282227539 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0637910048279 0.0743258471296 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0538753272311 0.0701772020484 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.116333557626 0.128457276422 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0630071425364 0.0628817314937 100% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.6 14.3799401198 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.54 12.5979740519 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.51 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 98.500998004 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.