"Of the two leading real estate firms in our town — Adams Realty and Fitch Realty — Adams Realty is clearly superior. Adams has 40 real estate agents; in contrast, Fitch has 25, many of whom work only part-time. Moreover, Adams' revenue last year was twice as high as that of Fitch and included home sales that averaged $168,000, compared to Fitch's $144,000. Homes listed with Adams sell faster as well: ten years ago I listed my home with Fitch, and it took more than four months to sell; last year, when I sold another home, I listed it with Adams, and it took only one month. Thus, if you want to sell your home quickly and at a good price, you should use Adams Realty."
In the preceding statement, the author asserts that Adam Realty is better than Fitch when some want to sell their house to get as many benefits as possible. The author makes a claim coming from a comparative about the number of agents, average revenue and the time needed to sell a house. The argument may seem quite tenable at first glance. However, it is not entirely logically convincing, when it ignores several certain crucial assumptions.
First, the writer claims that Adam real estate company is definitely superior to Fitch because it has more 15 agents and longer working hours. Although It could be mean that Adam Realty will have more investigation carried out and find more clients, it could be mean that the size of Adam Realty is bigger than Fitch. However, the quality of a company is evaluated by many factors except the number of its agents such as service quality, working efficiency and warranty must be taken into consideration, too.
Secondly, the argument offers the revenue of each company to implicit that the average home sales for Adams are better than Fitch one last year, 168000 and 144000 respectively. Nevertheless, it is no doubt that the house price is greatly affected by the locations. There is an assumption that the houses sold by Fitch were located in rural areas. So if Adam focuses on areas or big cities, we cannot claim that Adam is better. It would be more rational to compare the number of houses sold instead of average profits.
Last but not least, the argument is not completely sound. The evidence about the time need to sell a house in support of the conclusion is not sufficient to buttress the conclusion of argument because the author asserts his house was sold by Adams in only one month, while Fitch took 4 months ten years ago. The assumption here is that the two houses sold were equal quality and the market was the same too. However, it is obvious that after 10 year's development, the area in which the author lives have changed considerably, perhaps it is becoming more attractive to house buyers. What's more, if the second house was in much better condition compared to the first one, it would undoubtedly be more attractive. Thus the author's argument based on his experiment in non-persuasive at all.
Moreover, the argument might be strengthened by offering more information about the number of houses sold last year by each company, the statistic about the time needed for a house to be sold by each agent during the same period.
In conclusion, due to the above pieces of evidence, although the writer mentioned some factors that contribute to a better realty agent, the reasons are not deeply investigated or cover full of assumptions. As a result, the author needs scrutiny and thorough analysis can assert which real estate firm, Adam or Fitch, is better.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 484 350
No. of Characters: 2288 1500
No. of Different Words: 233 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.69 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.727 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.47 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 161 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 106 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 64 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.048 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.673 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.301 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.537 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.048 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 582, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: What's
...coming more attractive to house buyers. Whats more, if the second house was in much b...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 711, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...t would undoubtedly be more attractive. Thus the authors argument based on his exper...
^^^^
Line 4, column 720, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ndoubtedly be more attractive. Thus the authors argument based on his experiment in non...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, may, moreover, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, then, thus, while, in conclusion, no doubt, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.6327345309 148% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 28.8173652695 90% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2346.0 2260.96107784 104% => OK
No of words: 484.0 441.139720559 110% => OK
Chars per words: 4.84710743802 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69041575982 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.57078267669 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 240.0 204.123752495 118% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.495867768595 0.468620217663 106% => OK
syllable_count: 742.5 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.76447105788 160% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.4484909388 57.8364921388 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.714285714 119.503703932 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0476190476 23.324526521 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.66666666667 5.70786347227 117% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.247134983957 0.218282227539 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0727349778917 0.0743258471296 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0834724247162 0.0701772020484 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.138806146248 0.128457276422 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0771170474401 0.0628817314937 123% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.9 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 48.3550499002 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.15 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.2 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 98.500998004 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.