"Erosion of beach sand along the shores of Tria Island is a serious threat to our island and our tourist industry. In order to stop the erosion, we should charge people for using the beaches. Although this solution may annoy a few tourists in the short term, it will raise money for replenishing the sand. Replenishing the sand, as was done to protect buildings on the nearby island of Batia, will help protect buildings along our shores, thereby reducing these buildings' risk of additional damage from severe storms. And since beaches and buildings in the area will be preserved, Tria's tourist industry will improve over the long term."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
Citing the problem of erosion of beach sand along the shores of the Tria Island, and the threat it poses to the island and the tourism industry, the author recommends that visitors should be charged for using the beaches. Though, the threat mentioned by the author may raise concern among the Island authorities, it is unlikely to convince them to implement his suggestion.
Firstly, the author makes a bold assumption that the erosion can be reversed by replenishing the beach with sand brought from else where. To mention similar restoration of sand in the nearby island of Batia would be a gross generalization, since the reasons for erosion of beach sand on both the islands could be due to completely different reasons and to dissimilar extents. The opinion of knowledgible and reliable scientists working in relevant areas would provide a lucid view of the feasibility of the suggestion.
Nevertheless, the author speculates that the entry fee collected from the visitors will be sufficient to support the sand restoration project monetarily. An accurate appraisement of the funds required , taking into account the expected decrease in visitors due to the introduction of the entry fee system, would be crucial to estimate if the recommendation is implementable economically .
Moreover, the author states that replenishing the beach sand would make the onshore buildings less susceptible to damage during storms. Minutiae like the average frequency and intensity of storms in the area, and results of previous studies reagrding the restoration of beach sandand its effectiveness in preserving the buildings during these times, would render a clearer picture to the reader.
In conclusion, the argument put forward by the author is lacks any clinching proof and does not lead to any crystallized conclusions as it is. Pertinent scientific and statistical evidence would help in a better evaluation of the argument.
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Sentence: Minutiae like the average frequency and intensity of storms in the area, and results of previous studies reagrding the restoration of beach sandand its effectiveness in preserving the buildings during these times, would render a clearer picture to the reader.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by a determiner, possessive
Suggestion: Refer to sandand and its
Sentence: In conclusion, the argument put forward by the author is lacks any clinching proof and does not lead to any crystallized conclusions as it is.
Description: The token is is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to is and lacks
Sentence: The opinion of knowledgible and reliable scientists working in relevant areas would provide a lucid view of the feasibility of the suggestion.
Error: knowledgible Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Nevertheless, the author speculates that the entry fee collected from the visitors will be sufficient to support the sand restoration project monetarily.
Error: monetarily Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Minutiae like the average frequency and intensity of storms in the area, and results of previous studies reagrding the restoration of beach sandand its effectiveness in preserving the buildings during these times, would render a clearer picture to the reader.
Error: sandand Suggestion: sand and
Error: reagrding Suggestion: regarding
flaws:
No. of Words: 304 350
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 304 350
No. of Characters: 1588 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.176 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.224 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.955 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 124 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 96 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.636 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.731 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.545 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.381 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.699 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.092 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5