The following is taken from a memo from the advertising director of the Super Screen Movie Production Company.
"According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the past year. Clearly, the contents of these reviews are not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not with the quality of our movies but with the public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater share of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The memo story concludes that Super Screen Movie Production Company's movies was attended fewer people during the past year. And they have more positive review only in specific films, but they are not satisfied the contents of the reviews which is not reaching their prospective viewers. And then they assume that, the reason of this deceasing number of viewers' reason is not about the quality of their company's movies, they assume that the problem is public's luck of awareness that movies of good quality are available. So advertising director of the company recommend to Super Screen Movie Production Company allocate a greater share for advertising to reach through people. However, his assumptions are based on ambitious value that we need to find more information to evaluate his recommendation.
First of all, he only mentioned about last year's report. However, he is far from to show us other year's result. If he request other years result, then he has a chance to compare that is this decreasing is gradually or too sharp that happens only last year. After this he can say that their situation is bad enough to concern or not.
On the other hand, he did not inform us about the society's economic situation. Maybe the economy is not in good shape, people may need their basic needs rather then watching movies. But no where in the argument he mentioned economy of the society.
Moreover, If Super Screen Movie Production Company's movies were not attended enough during the past year, there is a gap evaluating their movies for public favor, Maybe last year's movies are not attractive enough for people to go an see their movies. Maybe people want to see some kind of specific actress and actresses. Maybe their movies don't have these character on their movie. Even more, maybe viewers found last years movies' subject is not attractive enough. Maybe their movies about war, maybe people want to see romantic or comedy movies. However, he never mentioned about the type of their movies. If the company wants more customer, he should investigate this problem asking their customers what they want to watch in survey. Hence, they will produce more viewers subjected movies in the future instead of allocating money to advertising.
Finally, he claimed about their movies quality. However, he did not tell anything why the problem is not quality, why people should not concern about their movies' quality? he never gave an answer to this vague problem.
In conclusion, he recommended to company to allocate more money on advertising to make the public more aware about their good quality of movies. However, there are many questionable assumptions he made. Hence, the argument is far from clear assumptions that, he should inquire more information to decide why is this year's results are decreasing, why people don't attend their movies, how is the economy, What viewers want to see? After all these information he can recommend more valuable suggestion to the Super Screen Movie Production Company.
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Sentence: And they have more positive review only in specific films, but they are not satisfied the contents of the reviews which is not reaching their prospective viewers.
Description: The fragment not satisfied the is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace satisfied with satisfied to
flaws:
No. of Words: 500 350 (The first paragraph can be shorter)
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 500 350
No. of Characters: 2451 1500
No. of Different Words: 208 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.729 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.902 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.415 2.4
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No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 115 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 49 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.231 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.661 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.808 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.339 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.551 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.223 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5