gre argument essay
argument topic:
The purpose of higher education is to prepare students for the future, but classen students are at a serious disadvantage in the competition for post-college employment due to the university's burdensome breadth requirements. classen's job placement rate is substantially lower than placement rates of many top-ranked schools. classen students would be more attractive to employers if they had more time to take advanced courses in their specialty, rather than being required to spend fifteen percent of their time at classen taking courses outside of their subject area. we demand, therefore, that the university abandon or drastically cut back on its breadth requirements.
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Author of this argument says that, classen students has a serious disadvantage in competition because of the univesity's burdensome breadth requirements. In order to avoid that, if they had more time to take courses on their speciality,rather than being required by the university to spend fifteen percent of their time at classen taking courses outside of their subject area. Author tells that it could improve the college placements and therefore they wanted to drastically cut back on its breadth requirements.
There are many flaws in the argument, first flaw is that stating University's burdensome breadth requirements as the serious disadvantage in competition for post-college employment. Author should have been more specific, by comparing the syllabus of the other colleges. one more point which has to be considered is, it is obvious for a person to have knowledge in their field but it is difficult to have reasonable knowledge apart from their field. if a student has that, it means he is highly capable of getting employed.
Second flaw in this argument is, by saying that classen's job placement rate is lower than placement rates of other top-raked colleges.In this author has not stated the reasons properly, he should have given even more details like the suggestions from the companies which come to recurit classen students. Author has also not said about the ranking of classen University because it is evident that top-colleges have good placements. If the ranking of the classen college is low, then that may also be the reason for less students getting placedbecause in low ranked colleges, employers prefer only few students who are top in their acedemics.
Third flaw is, if University abandon's bredth requirements, author says that it could attracts employers to classen university.But this is just a possibility, he has said that students would take up advanced courses in their speciality in free time. This may or may not be true, if author would have asked the university to conduct advanced courses rather than courses regarding other field.Then their is a certainity because students will definitely attendt advanced courses. But author says students may attend. One more point which has to be considered is, companies coming for placement, may think that one of the main advantange of classen university students is their diverse knowledge in other fields. If university abandon's the breadth requirements, then it may deter them.
Summing it up, University should not adandon its breadth requirements because it is an advantage to their college students. Instead it should make the breadth requirements such that it is very useful for their placements also and they should also be made aware of the importance of having breadth requirements. University should encourage students to take advanced courses of their speciality in their week ends or their leisure times. By doing so, they can definitely improve the placements of their University.
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Sentence: This may or may not be true, if author would have asked the university to conduct advanced courses rather than courses regarding other field.Then their is a certainity because students will definitely attendt advanced courses.
Description: The fragment . Then their is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace Then with adjective
Description: The tag a determiner, possessive is not usually followed by is
Suggestion: Refer to their and is
Sentence: If university abandon's the breadth requirements, then it may deter them.
Description: The tag a noun, singular, proper, genitive is not usually followed by the
Suggestion: Refer to abandon's and the
Sentence: There are many flaws in the argument, first flaw is that stating University's burdensome breadth requirements as the serious disadvantage in competition for post-college employment.
Error: post-college Suggestion: post college
Sentence: Second flaw in this argument is, by saying that classen's job placement rate is lower than placement rates of other top-raked colleges.In this author has not stated the reasons properly, he should have given even more details like the suggestions from the companies which come to recurit classen students.
Error: top-raked Suggestion: tolerated
Error: classen Suggestion: classes
Error: recurit Suggestion: recruit
flaws:
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.824 0.12
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 - 5.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 479 350
No. of Characters: 2459 1500
No. of Different Words: 202 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.678 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.134 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.782 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 182 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 150 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 69 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.176 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.043 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.824 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.374 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.588 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.17 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5