The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping.
To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
It is universally acknowledged that due to the increase in population, traffic in each country is amplifying and growing day by day. Some people hold the opinion that one of the best ways to reduce the overall traffic in major cities is to convenience people to work from home, moreover, if students can do study for some days from home, it can lead to the reduction in traffic congestion. While, to some extent I agree with this viewpoint, whereas, on the other hand, I think it would have more negative impacts, which I will try to enunciate in my essay below.
To begin with, undoubtedly, if every worker using laptops in the office is given a flexibility to work from home, such as, an employee working with software firms and a banking sector. Undeniably, this idea can reduce the number of people travelling to the office on the daily basis and consequently, can help in reducing the number of cars and traffic on the road. On the contrary, if these employees start working from home on the daily basis, definitely their relationship with the organization can be on the stake and can impact their career progress, because of this reason the idea cannot be fully implemented in most of the major companies.
Moreover, in case if student of a school or a college is given an opportunity to study from home instead of travelling to their education center on the daily basis. This fact has its pros and cons. Firstly, in terms of cost expenses to commute from home to school and vice versa would definitely go down. Secondly, students can save the travel time which can be utilized more in the studies. By the contrast, many middle class families cannot afford to have higher internet costs, which can allow their kids to study from home using the internet. In addition, it can have adverse impact on their children health, if they continuously sit in front of the computers for studies.
Furthermore, nowadays there are many online sites which provide a wide range of varieties of the daily goods which can be bought online. Some people prefer that, if in case every person starts using this facility adversely, this can also reduce the traffic on the road because they think that many people use their cars for daily shopping after office hours.
To recapitulate, there are multifarious ways which can help to reduce the increase traffic predicament on the road. However, forcing people to work from home and do online shopping is not one of the efficient solutions, but in case, if regime of a country introduces more public transports, this can be one of the possible options to reduce issues related to the traffic.
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Comments
Dear Sir, Many thanks for
Dear Sir,
Many thanks for your guidance. Noted all your points.
I will correct the essay and rewrite with correct paragraphs
Regards
flaws:
1. Better to have two paragraphs supporting one side, another paragraph against another side. like this:
paragraph 1: introduction -- explain in your own words about the issue and give a thesis statement at the end. Give a reasonable not a dogmatic statement.
paragraph 2: reason 1 + why reason 1 + example + a small conclusion for this paragraph.
paragraph 3: reason 2 + why reason 2 + example + a small conclusion for this paragraph.
paragraph 4: qualification -- moderate your position. This may involve a sentence beginning with "but" or "however"...
paragraph 5: conclusion -- reinforce the thesis.
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2. You gave a conclusion:
'but in case, if regime of a country introduces more public transports, this can be one of the possible options to reduce issues related to the traffic.'
but you never talked about public transports in the essays.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 455 350
No. of Characters: 2115 1500
No. of Different Words: 216 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.619 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.648 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.46 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 139 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 62 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.438 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.325 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.355 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.575 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.08 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5