Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of the society. Others, however believe that school is the place to learn this.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of the society. Others, however believe that school is the place to learn this.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is certainly true that the responsibility of teaching children is parent. However, instructing younger people to be a contributing member of society requires appropriately steps from both parents and teachers. Some people believe that school is the best place to discipline children and develop these skills whereas others think that this responsibility should take on parents’ shoulders. Both sides will be discussed carefully.

On the one hand, there are many reasons to support that parents should instruct their children to be a contributing person of society. Firstly, parents are persons who give the birth and look after their kids until they grow up. Thus, parents play main role to upbringing their children. If parents teach and guide their kids about socially acceptable behaviors, kids will understand more about acceptable behaviors and be able to follow discipline in a public. Therefore, the responsibility of guiding children should be taken by their parents.

On the other hand, schools are also another critical piece of the puzzle. The responsibility of discipline children is also schools and teachers. This is because children spend most of the day at school which is longer than living at home with family. Schools not only provide quality classes and valuable information but they should discipline their students about acceptable behaviors in society. For example, if schools outlaw regulations and control students’ behaviors appropriately, younger people will grow up and be a rewarding member of a public in the future. All of these support the idea that another important place to learn socially acceptable behaviors in youths is their school.

To sum up with my opinion both parents and teachers are very important to guide children to be a contributing member in the future. Without good taking care of children from both, it can cause kids to be poor emotional behaviors or unacceptable in society.

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the responsibility of teaching children is parent.
the responsibility of teaching children is by parent.

appropriately steps from both parents and teachers
appropriate steps from both parents and teachers

parents are persons who give the birth and look after their kids until they grow up.
Description: 'they' refers to what? Be sensitive to use pronouns.

parents play main role to upbringing their children.
parents play the main role to upbringing their children.

The responsibility of discipline children
The responsibility of disciplining children

Schools not only provide quality classes and valuable information but they should discipline their students
Description: 'Not only...but also' is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Different Words: 156 200

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 307 350
No. of Characters: 1594 1500
No. of Different Words: 156 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.186 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.192 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.799 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 126 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 38 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.059 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.476 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.647 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.339 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.518 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.046 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5