Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults.Why is this?Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Essay topics:

Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults.
Why is this?
Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Shopping has been a recent favorite activity to spend on free time by an adolescent in some states. This happens likely because of lack of public open space. Firstly, the essay will discuss the ground reason on developing shopping as the main choice of leisure activity and secondly, the essay will elaborate on the negative development that comes along with choosing to shop on free time.

Limited option on communal space for young people to spend their spare time has lead to force them to choose to shop. A decade ago, young adults had many options of place and recreation such as fish pond to fishing, open park with many facilities and unrestricted forest. Nowadays those open space removed as a compensating of urban lifestyle and state's massive expansion, consequently. In addition, this happens in many developing countries such as Indonesia, Thailand, and Malaysia. For example at Indonesia, between the years of 2009 and 2019, a lot of public garden and park has been replaced by skyscrapers and commercial buildings.

The habit to buy something whether in a retail or in a bulk could bring detrimental effect, especially at young people. That is to say, consumptive behavior troubled them to manage their money, thereby to set priority upon what is they need as opposed to what is they want. A research conducted by Harvard psychologist showed that young people who suffered from consumptive behavior tend to have a bad money management characteristic and poor financial position. This is supported by the high number of young adult who does not have any savings despite the fact that they already have a job.

In conclusion, the idea that shopping as a way to spend a spare time has grown stronger because of a narrow choice of leisure spot and consequently brings drawback on financial habit in the adolescent.

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Average: 8.4 (1 vote)
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2019-05-26 Suman Giri 84 view
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IELTS Writing Task II - IELTS Academic
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Comments

Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, for example, in addition, in conclusion, such as, that is to say

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 13.1623246493 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 10.4138276553 106% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 7.30460921844 96% => OK
Pronoun: 16.0 24.0651302605 66% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 41.998997996 117% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.3376753507 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1530.0 1615.20841683 95% => OK
No of words: 306.0 315.596192385 97% => OK
Chars per words: 5.0 5.12529762239 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.18244613648 4.20363070211 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74478678596 2.80592935109 98% => OK
Unique words: 177.0 176.041082164 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.578431372549 0.561755894193 103% => OK
syllable_count: 477.9 506.74238477 94% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 7.0 2.52805611222 277% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.76152304609 63% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.5628832644 49.4020404114 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.692307692 106.682146367 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.5384615385 20.7667163134 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.23076923077 7.06120827912 131% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.01903807615 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.67935871743 35% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.9879759519 125% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 3.4128256513 147% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.199367961467 0.244688304435 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0648659886559 0.084324248473 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0540956942022 0.0667982634062 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.106579966603 0.151304729494 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0552259378455 0.056905535591 97% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.9 13.0946893788 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 50.2224549098 96% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 11.3001002004 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.02 12.4159519038 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.91 8.58950901804 104% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 78.4519038076 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 9.78957915832 112% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.