There are some people that have opinion that the best way to face bad situation is by simply accepting it, while others say that trying and improving our conditions are better. I personally agree to both perspectives, as each of them has their own positive sides.
Accepting bad situation such as dissatisfying job and lacking of money is a good choice. Because, in every condition there is a great plan that God has prepared for us. For the example, as a bachelor of accounting, one of my dream job is working in the big 4 consulting companies. But, I didn't get accepted in those favorable companies. As a result, I should work in other company that is less favorable than them. Reacting to this condition, I can work lazily and perforcely, but then I choose to accept this situation and be thankful for it. This can create joyful mood for me and thus, leading into better work performance, because I do my job heartily.
On the other side, attempting and improving those considered-bad-situation can also lead into better things. For the example, I have already accepted the fact that i should work in another place. However, I keep learning new skills that are required by those big 4 firms. Consequently, my abilities will be improved and later I will have a better chance to be accepted in those firms.
So in conclusion, although many people may have different point of views, but I agree that both accepting and improving are both great ways to deal with bad situations, because each of them has beneficial impact to our life.
- Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations Discuss both these views and give your own opinion 67
- The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010 67
- At the present time the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults compared with the number of older people Do you think that the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages 67
- the two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant 67
- The chart below shows how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013 61
Please review my essay. I'm
Please review my essay. I'm really confused why my essay on this topic always stucks at the band 5.0-6.0 eventhough I have already attempted to write several times. Any comments or feedback are really appreciated. Thank you so much and God bless you..
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
1. Try not to use personal experiences because potentially it is going to make a big story while leaving no content for other ideas to demonstrate your languages.
If you really want to use personal experiences, it is fine too, but should finish in one to two sentences. never make a long story, and never even try to put personal experiences in whole essay.
2. the structure of the essay is not perfect. better to use this templates, give two reasons for both side and argue accordingly, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: idea one. first....second....
para 3: however, I still support idea two. reason one....reason two...
para 4: conclusion...
3. improve your languages, don't always use simple sentences, like:
I should work in other company that is less favorable than them. Reacting to this condition, I can work lazily and perforcely, but then I choose to accept this situation and be thankful for it.
I have already accepted the fact that i should work in another place. However, I keep learning new skills that are required by those big 4 firms.
4. you still have grammatical issues, like:
There are some people that have opinion that the best way to face bad situation is by simply accepting it,
There are some people who have opinion that the best way to face bad situation is by simply accepting it,
one of my dream job is...
one of my dream jobs is...
although many people may have different point of views, but I agree //although ...but...
many people may have different point of views, but I agree
although many people may have different point of views, I agree
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 269 350
No. of Characters: 1231 1500
No. of Different Words: 152 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.05 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.576 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.828 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 79 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 57 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 44 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.214 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.37 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.364 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.546 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.139 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Wow thank you so much for
Wow thank you so much for your quick response. I really appreciate this.....God bless you mate!
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 289, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
... the big 4 consulting companies. But, I didnt get accepted in those favorable compani...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 165, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
..., I have already accepted the fact that i should work in another place. However, ...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, however, if, may, so, then, thus, while, in conclusion, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 13.1623246493 91% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 7.85571142285 102% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 10.4138276553 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 24.0651302605 162% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 26.0 41.998997996 62% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.3376753507 84% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1275.0 1615.20841683 79% => OK
No of words: 268.0 315.596192385 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.75746268657 5.12529762239 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.04607285448 4.20363070211 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.92753071136 2.80592935109 104% => OK
Unique words: 149.0 176.041082164 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.555970149254 0.561755894193 99% => OK
syllable_count: 396.0 506.74238477 78% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 5.43587174349 147% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.10420841683 333% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.76152304609 42% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0721442886 87% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.2975951904 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.751118854 49.4020404114 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.0714285714 106.682146367 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.1428571429 20.7667163134 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.21428571429 7.06120827912 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.67935871743 138% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.229849994315 0.244688304435 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0747953773792 0.084324248473 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0765658195444 0.0667982634062 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.14898112123 0.151304729494 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0610797878737 0.056905535591 107% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.6 13.0946893788 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 50.2224549098 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 11.3001002004 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.33 12.4159519038 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.41 8.58950901804 86% => OK
difficult_words: 48.0 78.4519038076 61% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.1190380762 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.7795591182 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.