Do you agree or disagree? It is better to travel abroad to visit different countries when you are younger rather than when you are older.
Nowadays, tourism has developed rapidly to provide a lot of chances for people to go on a trip to other countries. However, in my opinion, it is better to travel abroad to visit different countries when people are younger rather than when people are older.
First of all, it is inconvenient for older people to visit different countries abroad. Because after we have finished our studying, we have to find appropriate companies to fit a favorable job and we must have a myriad of works to complete under the pressure of the boss. At the meanwhile, we still have to utilize our salaries to take care of our own families including children and parents. Thus, we may not acquire a spare time or a good opportunity to travel abroad. For example, my mother and my father planned to travel to Dubai last summer vacation. but unfortunately, the boss of the company where my mother work in stated an announcement that everyone in the company must to work for an extra month in that there is a gigantic housing project the company wants to compete. In this way, due to the one-month overworking, my parents lost the opportunity and canceled previous plan, which makes us quite unpleasant. Hence, traveling abroad to visit different coutries in a younger age would be more convenient than in a older age.
Furthermore, younger people still have an active mentality so travelling abroad would enrich their experience and provide enormous knowledge to learn. younger people are still curious of the world where they haven’t approached and they dream anything unknown. By comparion, older people may not interested in discovering novel things in the world. Consequently, younger people could be more proactive to enlarge their horizon and learn a lot. For instance, I studied about computer science in Korean last semester as an exchange student. I met numerous students from other countries such as England, America, India and we built strong relationships between each other. Through this travelling, I not only made multiple friends, but also learned considerable advanced transformative technologies and knowledges. If I go to there 30 years later, I may not obtain such significant knowledges and unforgettable experiences. Therefore, travelling abroad in a younger age would afford more beneficial experiences and extend our previews than in a older age.
In sum, travelling abroad to visit different countries in a younger age would conveniently supply more chances to enhance ourselves than in a older age.
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2020-04-30 | akimasa7887 | 66 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 558, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...o travel to Dubai last summer vacation. but unfortunately, the boss of the company ...
^^^
Line 5, column 677, Rule ID: MUST_HAVE_TO[1]
Message: After 'must', the verb is used without 'to'. Probably, you should use 'must' or 'have to' here.
Suggestion: must; have to
...nouncement that everyone in the company must to work for an extra month in that there i...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1025, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...er age would be more convenient than in a older age. Furthermore, younger pe...
^
Line 9, column 152, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Younger
...nd provide enormous knowledge to learn. younger people are still curious of the world w...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 683, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...lationships between each other. Through this travelling, I not only made multiple fr...
^^^^
Line 9, column 1045, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...riences and extend our previews than in a older age. In sum, travelling abro...
^
Line 13, column 141, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...re chances to enhance ourselves than in a older age.
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, furthermore, hence, however, if, may, so, still, therefore, thus, while, for example, for instance, such as, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 32.0 43.0788530466 74% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2115.0 1977.66487455 107% => OK
No of words: 410.0 407.700716846 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.15853658537 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49982852243 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93061137748 2.67179642975 110% => OK
Unique words: 226.0 212.727598566 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.551219512195 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 663.3 618.680645161 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.2726522961 48.9658058833 72% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.75 100.406767564 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5 20.6045352989 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.4 5.45110844103 154% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.215826275232 0.236089414692 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0726756525057 0.076458572812 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.108683310402 0.0737576698707 147% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.177815974287 0.150856017488 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0800384908975 0.0645574589148 124% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 11.7677419355 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 58.1214874552 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.65 10.9000537634 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.79 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 108.0 86.8835125448 124% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 83.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.