We are living in a big community. Each one of us has his own privite life and his own specific activities. Nowadays we have the first and second generation from our big family. I am sure that many people believe that we still have a good connection with our extented family, while other might disagree with that. However, when it comes to me I totally agree that we do not believe that our extended family has an important role in our life as it was in the past. I believe that for two important reasons. I will demonstarate my opinion in the folloeing essay.
To begin with, living outside our home country made us having a weak relationship with our extended family. We are living far away from our hometwon. We can not reach to our cousins and anuts easly as much as when we were living in the same city. For example, I movied to United States five years ago and left whole my family living in Egypt. So, i could not see them from long time. Moreover, my extended family have not the most recent technologies at their houses like face time, facebook and wifi to canotact them. As a result I could not talk to them or even see tham. In addition, I believe that from last decay we used to gather in grandmother's house to celebrate the feast and our birthday parties but, when I moved her i could not enjoy these great moment. As a result, we became more attached to our friends than our extened family. Consequently, grandmothers, aunts and uncles became less important to our life. This experience taught me that living far away from your country made your extended family has a little role in our present live.
In addition, nowadays we are so busy and no time for our extended family. Nowadays, we have many activities and responsiblities we have to get it done. So, sometimes we do not have time to talk to our family on daily basies like the past. Furthermore, we believe that if we have time to call one of our your family member, I believe my father and my mother are more important than my anuts. For instance, I working full time job. I have a little daughter she is five years old. She has many activities during the whole week like swimming and ballet. So, I am so busy with her. Besides, I have exams and many assigments related to my work. So, actually I do not have extra time to take to my extented family. In addition, I have like six hours different than my home country. So, it got it worse to have chance to call anybody from your old family members. This example compelling with my opinoin that we have a lose relationship with our extended family.
In conclusion, I believe that our extended family is less important now that it was in the past. This because we live in another country and because we have no time for them.
- TPO-50 - Independent Writing Task 3
- TPO-19 - Integrated Writing Task Many consumers ignore commercial advertisements. In response, advertising companies have started using a new tactic, called “buzzing." The advertisers hire people,buzzers,who personally promote (buzz) products to people 75
- tpo 26 Integrated task 60
- TPO 37 Integrated writing 3
- Our comunity is considered one of the most important aspects of our lives. The comunity is the place that we live in the whole time. It is aslo considered the city for our childern in the future. Some people I am sure would believe that young people nowad 66
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 348, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...ft whole my family living in Egypt. So, i could not see them from long time. More...
^
Line 3, column 652, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... decay we used to gather in grandmothers house to celebrate the feast and our bir...
^^
Line 3, column 730, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
... birthday parties but, when I moved her i could not enjoy these great moment. As ...
^
Line 5, column 406, Rule ID: I_AM[1]
Message: Did you mean 'I am'?
Suggestion: I am
... important than my anuts. For instance, I working full time job. I have a little ...
^
Line 5, column 416, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled as one.
Suggestion: fulltime
... than my anuts. For instance, I working full time job. I have a little daughter she is fi...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 754, Rule ID: RATHER_THEN[2]
Message: Did you mean 'different 'from''? 'Different than' is often considered colloquial style.
Suggestion: from
...dition, I have like six hours different than my home country. So, it got it worse to...
^^^^
Line 5, column 910, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...compelling with my opinoin that we have a lose relationship with our extended family. ...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, besides, but, consequently, first, furthermore, however, if, moreover, second, so, still, while, for example, for instance, in addition, in conclusion, as a result, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 105.0 43.0788530466 244% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 59.0 52.1666666667 113% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2247.0 1977.66487455 114% => OK
No of words: 508.0 407.700716846 125% => OK
Chars per words: 4.42322834646 4.8611393121 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.74751043592 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.44219789404 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 212.727598566 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.446850393701 0.524837075471 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 753.3 618.680645161 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 25.0 9.59856630824 260% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 33.0 20.6003584229 160% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.8930882097 48.9658058833 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 68.0909090909 100.406767564 68% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.3939393939 20.6045352989 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.69696969697 5.45110844103 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 14.0 4.88709677419 286% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.130735449812 0.236089414692 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0418991536333 0.076458572812 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0560512361352 0.0737576698707 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.106663840126 0.150856017488 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0249332942355 0.0645574589148 39% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 7.1 11.7677419355 60% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 58.1214874552 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 10.1575268817 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.06 10.9000537634 74% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.68 8.01818996416 83% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 86.8835125448 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.