Integrated essay

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Integrated essay

This lecture is about a set of clay jars that were found by local people in Iraq. The lecture offered by the professor completely refutes the passage. While the professor explains the possibility of using these jars as the batteries, the reading take the opposite standpoint.

First of all, the lecture claims that, vessels were found by local people. These individuals were not trained to find valuable things like the archaeologist. They might found wires, and they overlook them, because they were not interesting to them. As a result, the absence of wires is not convinced. On the other hand, the reading states that as there is no evidence of the metal wires existence, these jars cannot be considered as batteries.

Second, the professor agrees with the similarity of copper cylinders in jars and the ones found in Seleucid. Also, it is possible to preserve scrolls inside it. But, maybe these jars were first used as one purpose, and then there were adapted to other purposes. However, the reading hold the opposite view. It claims that it is very likely that jars were used for holding scrolls because of their shape.

Third, the lecturer talks about mild shock that was an invisible power. People considered this power a magic one. The mild shock might be used for healing. People used it to stimulate muscles and decrease pains. Meanwhile, the passage explains that as there were no devices to generate electricity, this assumption is not true, and jars were completely useless.

To sum up, one may come to the conclusion that the lecture and the passage are absolutely opposite of each other.

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Comments

the reading take the opposite standpoint.
the reading takes the opposite standpoint.

Sentence: They might found wires, and they overlook them, because they were not interesting to them.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to might and found

Sentence: On the other hand, the reading states that as there is no evidence of the metal wires existence, these jars cannot be considered as batteries.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to wires and existence

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2

better to have 4 paragraphs:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 12
No. of Words: 271 250
No. of Characters: 1292 1200
No. of Different Words: 140 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.057 4.2
Average Word Length: 4.768 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.396 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 82 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 40 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.263 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.418 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.526 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.297 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.519 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.053 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4