TOEFL T P O 34 - Integrated Writing Task
The lecture and the reading passage discuss the extinction of Steller's sea cow which once lived in the Bering Island of the Siberia. Although the passage claims there theories about the main causes of the sea cows' extinction, the speaker refutes these ideas through a number of reasons which I will describe in this report.
First and foremost, the passage points out that sea cows may have been overhunted by native Siberian people and became extinct. The lecturer, in contrast, rejects this by claiming that sea cows were a massive creature and they were very heavy. He also adds that Siberian people did not have a large population in those times. Therefore, the overhunting theory is not true because Siberian people did not have to kill a lot of sea cows to support the food source of their small population.
Furthermore, unlike the passage which states that ecosystem's disturbances may have affected the kelp's population which was the main food source for sea cows and contributed to their extinction, the professor argues that if any disturbances had occurred, it would have effects not only on kelps but also on other sea animals like whales. But there is not any evidence to show that whale population had decreased. Thus, this hypothesis could not be true.
Finally, although the reading passage says that European fur traders may have killed a large number of sea cows and caused their extinction, the speaker disagrees by mentioning that the sea cows' population was quite small when European came to the island. Therefore, something was causing a massive decline in the sea cows' population long before the time European arrived there, so they were not the main reason for the sea cows' extinction.
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Older teenagers (16-19) should be allowed to work at paid part-time jobs. 70
- TPO 46 73
- Do you agree or disagree? If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying 70
- It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parents jobs than to choose jobs that are very different from their parents job 66
- TOEFL TPO 34 - Integrated Writing Task 60
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 97, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'kelps'' or 'kelp's'?
Suggestion: kelps'; kelp's
...tems disturbances may have affected the kelps population which was the main food sour...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 86, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...at European fur traders may have killed a large number of sea cows and caused their extinction, t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 191, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'cows'' or 'cow's'?
Suggestion: cows'; cow's
...er disagrees by mentioning that the sea cows population was quite small when Europea...
^^^^
Line 4, column 318, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'cows'' or 'cow's'?
Suggestion: cows'; cow's
...as causing a massive decline in the sea cows population long before the time Europea...
^^^^
Line 4, column 424, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'cows'' or 'cow's'?
Suggestion: cows'; cow's
...ey were not the main reason for the sea cows extinction.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, furthermore, if, may, so, therefore, thus, in contrast
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 10.4613686534 96% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 5.04856512141 119% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 7.30242825607 110% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 12.0772626932 108% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 22.412803532 94% => OK
Preposition: 27.0 30.3222958057 89% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 5.01324503311 239% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1428.0 1373.03311258 104% => OK
No of words: 287.0 270.72406181 106% => OK
Chars per words: 4.9756097561 5.08290768461 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.11595363751 4.04702891845 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52941994416 2.5805825403 98% => OK
Unique words: 148.0 145.348785872 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.515679442509 0.540411800872 95% => OK
syllable_count: 441.9 419.366225166 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 3.25607064018 92% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.23620309051 85% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.25165562914 160% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 2.5761589404 39% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 13.0662251656 84% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 21.2450331126 122% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 81.4882235572 49.2860985944 165% => OK
Chars per sentence: 129.818181818 110.228320801 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0909090909 21.698381199 120% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.36363636364 7.06452816374 104% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 4.19205298013 119% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 4.33554083885 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 4.45695364238 90% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.27373068433 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.618279330381 0.272083759551 227% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.238034731031 0.0996497079465 239% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.137543320241 0.0662205650399 208% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.386485682706 0.162205337803 238% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0951479614521 0.0443174109184 215% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 13.3589403974 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 53.8541721854 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 11.0289183223 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.9 12.2367328918 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.39 8.42419426049 100% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 63.6247240618 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.7273730684 84% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.498013245 118% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.2008830022 80% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 78.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.