Tpo 28- integrated writing

In the set of material, both the professor and the reading discuss Robert E. Peary who was well known adventure and arctic . The reading provides three arguments provide strong support for the truth of Peary's claim. Conversely the professor refutes each claim in the reading and he says that there is no solid evidence that confirmed Peary was reaching the pole.

First, the reading claims that, the National Geographic society put together a committee that was instructed to conduct through investigation of Peary's record and equipment. But the professor says that, it is true Peary's accounts were consistent and persuasive and declared that he had indeed reached the North Pole. But it is not completely objective. The committee didn't examine him ,so they are not in trust.

Second, the reading says that, a recent expedition provides support for Peary's claim that he reached the North pole in only 37 days after setting out from Ellesmere island off the coast of Greenland. However the professor says that, the speed is different between Peary and Avery, moreover Every dropped by airplane, and Peary was in unfavorable conditions. furthermore Every was so different from Peary.

Third, the reading argues that, there are photographs taken by Peary that support his claim to have reached the North Pole. But the professor says that, the photographs don't approve anything. The shadow of the photograph should precise to locate the position of the sun. But the shadow looked blurred and it cannot used to calculate the position of the sun and cannot confirm that they were taken at the North Pole.

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who was well known adventure and arctic
who was a well known adventure in arctic

The reading provides three arguments provide strong support for the truth of Peary's claim
The reading provides three arguments which provide strong support for the truth of Peary's claim

there are photographs taken by Peary that support his claim
there are photographs taken by Peary to support his claim

Sentence: The shadow of the photograph should precise to locate the position of the sun.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to should and precise

Sentence: But the shadow looked blurred and it cannot used to calculate the position of the sun and cannot confirm that they were taken at the North Pole.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to cannot and used

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2

The first argument is wrong.

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 18 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 12
No. of Words: 266 250
No. of Characters: 1308 1200
No. of Different Words: 136 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.039 4.2
Average Word Length: 4.917 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.485 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 93 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 76 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 45 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.462 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.073 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.846 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.382 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.589 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.161 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4