Children today are not as fit and healthy as in the past. Discuss the causes for this situation with relevant examples and give your opinion on possible solutions.
Nowadays, we hear a lot of reports about health situation of people especially children. Unfortunately, these report do not good, people have suffer with some health problem like overweight, or some incurable disease like cancer. Our children every day become fatter and there is some obvious and hidden reason for that.
To beginning, the most significant reason is TV programs. Some research shows children spend more than 5 hours per day in front of TV and watch TV programs. In additional, children are big fan of computer games. They spend many hours to play these games; they used computer, laptop, tablet or smart phone for play.
Moreover, junk foods like Pizza and Sandwich and so on has a big role in this issue. These kinds of foods are harmful for everybody because of extra oil and salt. You can see KFC branch or Macdonald branch everywhere, and see their fat client too. Furthermore, people become lazy these days; they do not exercise as the past. Children are not exception, they copy their parent behavior. In the past children used to do more outdoors activities, but now, they stay in house and play computer games.
To sum up, the reasons mention above are not all reasons there is a lot of reason else. Parents have big responsibilities to solve this problem. They should banned children to watch TV or play computer games for more than 2 hours per day. They should enroll their children in some sport classes like football, swimming and so on. Besides, pay attention to their nutrition, make more home cooking rather buying fast food.
these report do not good,
these reports are not good,
Sentence: Unfortunately, these report do not good, people have suffer with some health problem like overweight, or some incurable disease like cancer.
Description: A verb 'to have', uninflected present tense, infinitive or is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to have and suffer
Sentence: Our children every day become fatter and there is some obvious and hidden reason for that.
Description: The fragment day become fatter is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace become with verb, past tense
Sentence: They should banned children to watch TV or play computer games for more than 2 hours per day.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to should and banned
flaws:
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Sentence Length SD: 3.891 7.5
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 267 350
No. of Characters: 1250 1500
No. of Different Words: 155 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.042 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.682 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.353 2.4
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No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 54 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 40 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 17 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.833 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 3.891 7.5
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Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.299 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.433 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.063 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5